(This was a post I put on my Facebook community page, dated 27/04/13)
I used to think it was horrendous that I know the depths of pain people who are in unbearable pain can be in and the worst emotions and thoughts that can cause.
I also used to think it was terrible that I know how it feels to feel ‘terminally alone’.
But, if I didn’t truly know this, in a real deep and prolonged way, I wouldn’t be able to relate to others and understand their deep intense pain.
I’ve talked about this with people (even abuse survivors) who clearly don’t know the depth of this level of suffering, don’t know what it is like to have absolutely no-one and feel completely, terminally alone. Their faces are blank, there’s no recognition of how horrendous this can be and I’m glad for them, because it is beyond description and I wouldn’t want anyone to feel that way.
There needs to be people in the world who know the worst levels of suffering, to help others through it.
Although I am not happy I have suffered, I know it is a privilege to be able to help others with the same.
I’m not just putting a positive spin on it, I truly know my life was to be able to understand others, fully, deeply.
I’m not at a point in my healing yet, to be able to help people on a level any more than I do via the internet, but I know that’s where I am heading.
And for that, I am thankful.
What a privilege it is to help others, with such profound needs.