It is Mother’s Day here.

I tried yesterday, to cry out my grieving over my mother and the pain of not being able to celebrate her on this day.
My children have given me my lovely presents and of course I was delighted and loved the cuddles and the cards that said I am the best Mummy in the world.
But, inside I am hurting, the pain is there and I am braving the day for my family, so they don’t know my pain.

Abandonment by both parents, intensely, deeply painful…

People with relatively normal attachments to one or both parents, will never understand the impact of not forming good attachments with both parents.

Emotional flashbacks and you don’t understand what they are about…

Today, I was googling books I read as a child. I’ve been doing a little inner child work with myself, wanting to have new memories relating to my childhood, that help reduce the bad ones.

I looked up a few books and it was okay.

But, then I looked up one book, The Diddakoi, which I can’t remember the age I was when I read it, and out of the blue, an emotional flashback, no picture, just knowing I was a child, crying, sad, alone.

I feel like I am on The Truman show some days…..life cannot be like this surely…

I am struggling to understand so much of what goes on this world and reconcile that with people who genuinely believe they have maturity and intelligence.

Take the issue of people who lie….people who have admitted to lying, admitted in writing to lying, hiding things and more. And then bleat and want everyone to believe them….now. That they are not a liar….now. And, worse, other people probably do believe them.

Weekends can be so hard!

I find weekends when my husband is working so hard.

Having severe PTSD and young noisy children home all day, are not an easy mix.

What is the most important factor in your healing journey…

Whenever I am asked what is the most important thing to me in my healing journey – I tell them my relationship with God, my heavenly Father.

I know this is where my peace is found, where my strength is from, where my healing is found and where my heart to help others was created.

I believe fully my life was for a purpose, for God’s purpose and I always knew there had to be a reason.