Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.

Why those who remain neutral, who don’t support the victim, are wrong.


“I swore never to be silent whenever and wherever human beings endure suffering and humiliation.
We must always take sides.
Neutrality helps the oppressor, never the victim.
Silence encourages the tormentor, never the tormented.”

Elie Wiesel – Holocaust concentration camp survivor, 1986 Nobel Peace prize winner, political activist, humanitarian and award winning author.

When people support the perpetrator of harm/abuse, when they chose to support their friendship/relationship with someone who had caused harm to another, when they don’t support the victim, when they remain neutral – they are making themselves as wrong/sinful as the perpetrator.

Silence is not golden, and silence is what allows harm to continue.

And the truth, is what sets you free.

There are many systems set up throughout society, to protect the perpetrator more than the victim, including the criminal justice systems and the in-house ‘whitewashing’ systems many organisations choose to deal with crimes/scandals/abuse/harm/lies.

And when people in authority, hide behind excuses and justification, particularly biblical quotes of forgiveness, they are causing further harm an become willing accomplices in the harm/suffering/sin the victim is enduring.

Harm, abuse, lies, suffering, oppression, needs to be dealt with in full. This means ensuring the appropriate action is taken, ensuring those who are authority and are meant to ensure this, do not ignore, condone, excuse, remain neutral, or ‘whitewash’.

I believe in taking a stand, I believe in ensuring all steps to try to ensure justice can prevail, always need to be taken.

I won’t; ignore, allow oppression, allow justifications, allow others to condone, allow ‘whitewashing’, allow taking sides with perpetrators, allow further harm to continue.

If this matter is on my heart, I will do all I can to ensure the appropriate actions occur, and sometimes that means having to do things others will not ‘approve of’. Sometimes that means taking action that others will consider wrong, if it goes against their own ideas of what is okay. But, if it is the truth, then it is always ‘right’.

And tough, I don’t ‘approve’ of their poor handling of harm caused, remaining neutral, or taking sides with someone proven to be a perpetrator of harm.

If I walk in integrity, if I ensure justice is more likely to prevail, if I always act with a heart that knows to help the oppressed and suffering, if I always remain completely honest, then I know I am always taking the right action.

And if I have prayed about it, feel it is on my heart, feel I have been set a task that I need to see through, then I will.

Jesus did not ever stand for ignoring the oppressed and neither will I.

Micah 6:8 He has shown you, O mortal, what is good. And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.

As long as mercy has been shown, to give the perpetrators opportunity to put right their wrongs, to have full repentance, to tell the truth and have remorse, then mercy has been shown. If they choose not to be honest, not have full repentance, then they also choose to expect that further action can and will and should be taken, to ensure their actions are dealt with in a just and appropriate and fair manner.

God values free will. He does not value lies, or the free will been used for harm, abuse, lies, suffering, dishonesty. God remains close to the broken hearted and oppressed.

And God equips some with the courage, integrity, discipline for honesty, heart for mercy/grace, desire for righteous intent, but strength to see matters through and the knowledge that they will be protected and loved.

And I am one of those people.

Author: Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

I am a survivor of complex and multiple trauma and abuse, who at the age of 40, began my healing journey. I am using my journey to recovery and healing, to help others, to help survivors feel less alone, validated, encouraged and to enable others to understand themselves more. Complex trauma, particularly from severe, prolonged childhood abuse, is profoundly life changing. Complex trauma produces complex adults. The journey to recovery is a painful, often lonely, emotional daily challenge and it is my aim to encourage others in their daily battle. ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

5 thoughts on “Why those who remain neutral, who don’t support the victim, are wrong.

  1. Martin Luther King said “He who passively accepts evil is as much involved in it as he who helps to perpetrate it. He who accepts evil without protesting against it is really cooperating with it.”
    and “In the end we will remember not the words of our enemies but the silence of our friends.”
    I am a follower of Jesus and a PTSD survivor – I like your article.

  2. Pingback: If we can refrain from harming others in our everyday actions and words, we can start to give more serious attention to actively doing good. | philosiblog

  3. You are awesome.
    Why do people want to avoid stress so badly that they will drive by a person getting beaten?
    Because they don’t want to become a victim too. This world is so determined to allow people to feel just fine with only caring for themselves that people do not even feel bad about it. They may act as if they do. But to me, if you really feel bad about a situation, you won’t ignore it. If you see human suffering and turn your head, those are the people that take away your hope in humanity. They are week. Watch how quickly they will want help if the tables turn. But they didn’t want to deal with that drama?
    Thank you for being humane, for telling it like it is and giving an opinion that has purpose and stands tall for what is right. Injustice is a terrible burden to bear, and people make it harder to want to survive when suddenly no one is behind you, they all ran to safety, not wanting to risk attack themselves.