Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.


When Church’s are more like a cult, than a Church.

The previous Church I used to go to, clearly do not like to be challenged. I have challenged them and they acted just like a stage 3 Church, stuck in spiritual development, immature in spiritual progression.

The leadership do not like to be challenged. Especially by a woman.

They talk all the time of women knowing their place, they cannot be elders and deacons, they cannot speak a message to men, they have to be in complete submission to their husbands, they are made to feel guilty if they work and don’t stay home where they belong, cooking, cleaning, raising the children, waiting for the authority of the house to come home.

And they openly and directly criticise anyone who falls outside of their Church rules, criticise other Church’s, other denominations, up on their ‘stage’. They have openly said that if the Baptist denomination say gay people are to be welcome and not judged, they will leave the Baptist denomination and I guess they will go and set up their own little cult-like Church. Continue reading


Why I don’t use these same standard phrases, like other Christians.

I watch people closely, I am constantly assessing people, it’s like breathing to me.

I’ve watched people pray, in Church, at home group and they all love to use standard phrases and it’s like if you don’t use these standard phrases, then you are less ‘Godly’, and the more you use these standard phrases, the more ‘mature’ in your faith you are.

When I talk to God, I just talk, I don’t use any of these phrases, I just talk the way He knows I already think. Because of that very reason – He already knows my every thought. I’m honest, real and He knows that. Continue reading


My budgie, called Flopsy.

My sister and I nagged our parents for a pet, and they didn’t want one, but in the end they gave in.

I remember us telling them everyone we knew has a pet bar me and my sister. I knew as well, if I said it was for my sister – not just me, that was far more likely to get a good response, she usually got her way. That’s the way it was.

Dogs and cats were vetoed – too much care needed. While we were young, my mother barely cared for her children, so pets to care for were definitely not a good thing by her. We were give options, low maintenance pet options. Continue reading


I face a life of never being popular or liked, by being true to God.

We all have choices in life.

Some of my choices, to do the right thing, means I am not popular.

Dealing with a spiritual abuse formal complaint about someone in Church leadership, has made me very unpopular with an entire Church and I accept that, I accept they don’t understand what I know. Continue reading


2 Comments

Spirtual abuse from Church leaders, is the worst abuse. It is evil, pure evil.

I have a community page and I see so many people on my page and other pages talking about how the abuse they suffered from Church’s, from priest, from pastors, has affected their faith and caused them to doubt God and separated them from their faith in God.

This angers me and upsets me greatly. Continue reading