Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.

Spirtual abuse from Church leaders, is the worst abuse. It is evil, pure evil.


I have a community page and I see so many people on my page and other pages talking about how the abuse they suffered from Church’s, from priest, from pastors, has affected their faith and caused them to doubt God and separated them from their faith in God.

This angers me and upsets me greatly.

I am aware my ability to completely separate the spiritual abuse I endured, from God and understand so clearly what occurred and how God is using me, my weaknesses being used last year and my strengths being used this year, for His purposes, and how I have never once doubted God in this and still remained in complete understanding of how much He loves me, how good He is, how perfect He is, is rare.

I am also aware the spiritual abuse I endured, whilst devastating, is not the same as a Church leader who rapes someone, or sexually abuses a child. That is sexual abuse, as well as spiritual abuse. Grooming someone whether an adult or child, is abuse.

All spiritual abuse is evil, is trauma and is of Satan, not of God, regardless of the severity.

I don’t think the all the abusers are evil, but what they did is and if they’ve been used that easily by Satan, then it will happen again, especially if they are narcissists who are unable to change.

And what’s worse, is other Christians are enabling this – not understanding the spiritual consequences of minimizing, condoning, ignoring these spiritual abusers. Thinking their concept of grace and forgiveness, is what is needed.

What is needed is for anyone who has spiritually abused another person – to be removed from leadership immediately. And that abuser being given the help they need to understand their abuse and the consequences and not being given the chance to allow Satan to use their huge weaknesses again. Because he will.

The spiritual abuser needs help as much as the abused – especially if they are narcissists but they should not be enabled to abuse again, not when they are Church leaders.

And this is why God is using me in this, because I understand this so clearly, even if other Christians choose to take a different view, I know their view is wrong and is sin, even if they don’t understand it.

Spiritual abuse is enabled by so many Christians and it is so wrong.

Satan is in all of this, and wants people divided from God, wants people to become non believers, wants people to state God cannot exist, or isn’t good.

Satan wants Christians to minimize it, get caught up in all the religious stuff and miss the most important point – spiritual abuse is evil and the worst kind.

My understanding of this, is something I can no doubt use in the future, I am already using it now and I know by talking about this, having endured it, will be helping God.

Spiritual abuse has a level of deeper betrayal, because it causes the worst outcome – people doubting their Faith, doubting God.

Spiritual abuse is evil, as all abuse is, but for me has a deeper level of evil.

It hurts my heart and makes me want to cry when I see those words ‘God can’t love me if he let Church leader abuse me’, or ‘I don’t believe in God as he let me suffer too much’ and the worst ‘God hates me’.

I know that pain, I went through it last year. I was deeply in pain, to believe God could let me suffer so badly. Why me? I believed at that point He hated me. And that felt like the worst betrayal of all.

But, I know that is so not what is occurring and I know Satan wanted me to believe that, but God had a plan to ensure I would come though that and to understand this is the opposite of the reality.

God is love, pure love and He is perfect.

And I so want every single person to know this. For their eternal life, but also for their suffering now.

I don’t want people who have been spiritually abused to be telling everyone else not to believe in God, this is what Satan wants and it breaks my heart.

The spiritual war going on is something I am so aware of. I see how it affects me and I see so clearly how it is affecting so many people, so many people who have been abused and are hurting and don’t know the peace that comes with understanding who God is.

Hurts my heart.


Author: Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

I am a survivor of complex and multiple trauma and abuse, who at the age of 40, began my healing journey. I am using my journey to recovery and healing, to help others, to help survivors feel less alone, validated, encouraged and to enable others to understand themselves more. Complex trauma, particularly from severe, prolonged childhood abuse, is profoundly life changing. Complex trauma produces complex adults. The journey to recovery is a painful, often lonely, emotional daily challenge and it is my aim to encourage others in their daily battle. ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

2 thoughts on “Spirtual abuse from Church leaders, is the worst abuse. It is evil, pure evil.

  1. Pingback: Is That You, Jesus? | Ever So Gently

  2. In total agreement…Spiritual Abuse from church leaders, is the worst, because it is evil….
    I myself will trust in God…no matter what…if it was Satan’s plan to separate me from God…as worst as the molestation, rape and abuse was…that will never happen…I will say like Job 13&15….Though he slay me, yet will I trust in him.. After Job was ripped of everything he loved…and even his own wife told him to curse God and die….Job continued to trust in God….in the end…God gave Job double for his trouble…..I finally realized that I rather have God and not need him, than to need him and not have him….but he will never leave you…I don’t care…. He is always a prayer away….don’t turn your back on God…he has given you another day, another hour, another minute….he is not mad at you…he is madly in love with you….and he wants to show you…he can heal that pain….God knew you when you were in your mother’s womb…maybe you were chosen…that others might be delivered through your testimony…here is your chance to turn it around and defeat Satan. He came to steal, kill and destroy…here is your chance to tear down his kingdom of child abuse….Use your struggle for your mission….and if you never knew what your purpose was…. that may be just it…Let your passion become your purpose for living….May God continue to bless you on your journey of life…