Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.


Feeling emotions deeply & empathy = greater brain development.


People who don’t feel emotions deeply and don’t have empathy and don’t have self insight, will often say that those who do – are weak, lack strength and are stupid.

This is because, those who don’t have these, can’t understand them and their ego will assume it means the other empathic, emotional, insightful person, is wrong, weaker.

I read that people with empathy, who feel emotions deeply have that area of the brain more developed and this is being proven with neuroscience. There is also more blood flow and brain activity in that area, so this means more development is occurring too.

Whereas, those who lack empathy, don’t feel emotions deeply, don’t have compassion for others, actually have less brain development and less blood flow and less activity, and that area of the brain, continues to die and shrink.

If not exercised, the brain dies quicker. Continue reading

When you are going through hell….


The need to find deep inner unshakeable, self esteem.

self esteem

I don’t want all I have been through to make me a hardened person, who doesn’t care about anything, who is cold and hard to the needs of others. I don’t believe I could ever end up hardened. Other people’s needs, and suffering, pain, are always something I am aware of, and that empathy, my empathic soul, will always be there.

But, I am aware of the need to toughen up emotionally, not ‘need’ people, not rely on anyone, not expect or want anyone to understand me, not be emotionally hurt and affected by the actions of others, or the lack of actions of others. Continue reading


Most people don’t actually listen….

I see this all the time.

Most people don’t listen from the other person’s life/experiences, they only listen from their own biased experiences and react and respond accordingly.

It’s the ego, selfishness in humanity, that causes this.

Empathy, is rare.

Most people only hear what they want to hear, and respond in a way that is for themselves.

It’s why people will say things they know are likely to be hurtful, but say them anyway and add things like ‘I hope you don’t feel offended by this, but….’. Knowing the person will likely be hurt, offended but they feel ‘entitled’ to say it anyway. Instead of just shutting up.

Listening, combined with empathy, is a skill, that needs to be developed and is not common.

1 Comment

Are You a Magnet for Narcissists?

Very interesting reading.

An Upturned Soul

Please Note: You can skip whatever part you are not interested in – I’m assuming you’re interested in a part of this as you’re reading it – and go straight to whichever part you are looking for. PART ONE indulges my need to understand NPD due to my being the only child of two Narcissists. PART TWO is my experience of what attracts Narcissists. PART THREE is my experience of  what having a relationships with a Narcissist means for the person who is a magnet for Narcissists like I am. PART FOUR is a bit of a rant about Narcissists and what I’ve learned about myself and self expression due to repeatedly attracting them and learning shit from them.

I read a blog post the other day written by a woman who became alarmed that her propensity to attract Narcissists was a sign that she herself could be one. She…

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