I strongly believe that where there are limited resources, they should be focussed more on the victims of abuse, than the perpetrators of abuse.
So much of ‘developed’ countries resources – go to helping those who commit acts of great harm and abuse.
Repeat sex offenders and paedophiles and psychopaths, are given counselling, help to manage their behaviour, sex offender programs that cost around $180,000 per offender, per program.
And victims, mostly have to fund their own appropriate amount of counselling, to deal with the massive harm and often lifelong/long term damage caused. Particularly severe child abuse survivors.
In a more ideal world – everyone would be able to access all the help they.
But, this is not an ideal world. By far.
So, where resources, financial support and counselling are limited, it should be focussed on the victims.
The victims didn’t get a ‘choice’ in being abused.
The abusers, had a choice. Unless they were psychotic (not to be confused with psychopaths), which is responsible for a miniscule amount of the abuse carried out in this world.
And if they are repeat serious abuse offenders, they should be removed from society so they can no longer offend.
I was shocked to read on a self confessed/diagnosed psychopaths website, that he has knowingly/intentionally murdered 3 people, on 3 separate occasions, has no remorse, is happy to be who he is, admits he could do it again, and was let out of prison, because he agreed to have neuroscience testing done on him and counselling. Outrageous. This is an example of how unhealthy our society is.
And this is not uncommon. It happens continually with untreatable paedophiles, sex offenders, rapists, child rapists etc. And they are given priority for all Government funding. Continue reading
Great article ^^^.
I knew Fifty Shades of Grey – was a very unhealthy way of normalising unhealthy/dangerous behaviour. I couldn’t read them. And seriously – I am no prude. But, I have grown rapidly in the last 2 years.
Society is absolutely hell-bent on increasing narcissism/sociopaths – and very unhealthy behaviours and thinking. And ‘intelligent’ people are running to it in their millions…’oh I can’t wait for the movie to come out!’
There is something very sick – about finding a very emotionally unwell man who was abused in his childhood, acting out his unhealthy desires on a woman – and calling that ‘enjoyable’ and being aroused by that.
And do people not realise this increases sexual violence to women and rape culture?
Fifty Shades of You Need Counselling.
Fifty Shades of Perversion.
Fifty Shades of Narcissism.
Fifty Shades of Are You A Narc? No seriously?
Fifty Shades of ‘Why on earth are you not realising how sick this is?????’
I can hear some people saying ‘oh she is just affected by her past abuse’. I say – believe that if you need to, but you are wrong.
It is interesting how people put ‘absolutes’ and ‘limits’ in their thinking, based upon their own capacity and their own abilities, or something they read that reinforces their own belief.
If people are capable of altruism – the truly selfless act of doing good for others with no personal gain, or expectation of anything in return..
How can anyone, say that is not possible?
I realise, this is their own capacity for reasons and motivations for doing anything for others, is purely their own level of awareness.
It’s the same as spiritual faith progression. People only know their own level and can’t understand anything higher/further. As so well explained in James Fowler’s Stages of Faith – powerful stuff – for those who ‘get it’.
I know people like this – they believe what they are told, don’t question and think ‘serving’ in their church and family – is all there is. And anyone who doesn’t agree with that – lacks faith. They just don’t see there is more than this for some. Most Christians stay stuck at this stage 3 level and never progress.
Having seen and heard and read of so much abuse that goes on within Christianity – as to how to deal with victims of abuse – I see a need for wise Christians, to go round as many churches as possible, to show them how to deal with it appropriately.
Christians do the following far too much and it is abuse, whether intentionally, or not;
You are not healed from abuse yet because;
– “you just need to pray more”
– “you just haven’t forgiven yet”
– “don’t speak out about the abuse, that isn’t going to help”
– “you are choosing to nurse, rehearse, curse your trauma”
– “you haven’t repented of your own sins enough yet”
– “mental health illness, is evil
– “mental health illness is demonic possession
– “you have a mental health diagnosis, you must be lying/or confused”
– “if you loved God, you wouldn’t have been abused, or have mental health illness”
– “don’t seek counselling, you don’t need it, all you need to do is pray”
– “well I must side with that person you have accused of abuse, because if I don’t, I will get hassle off other church people” Continue reading
I have done my research and I have thought a lot about the life of a street child in Nepal, or in abusive orphanages, as some are.
I don’t have some romantic denial of how it will be when I get there. I’m not going to ‘get anything back’. I will be going because I believe that every child needs to know that there are some people who will treat them with respect, and because they deserve to be treated well – regardless of what they do in return.
I know these children will be deeply untrusting, highly suspicious, will probably lie, steal if they could, will not trust me and I don’t believe it will be all hugs and like some D grade TV movie.
I’m expecting to be treated the way they treat anyone else – but will still offer them respect and care anyway.
No child should have to endure a life of only adults who use, abuse and treat them like they have no worth.
I want to show them a little of how they should be treated. Because the more that do this, the better. Some will say it is a waste of time. But, no child and no effort is ‘ever’ a waste of time. Continue reading
I am seeking further legal advice and I will ensure my family and I are protected.
And if I find out there is no legal re-course against me, for exposing the truth about abuse within a Church, I will be exposing it to every person I know connected within that church, and connected outside of that church.
Including every church in the vicinity of the area.
People deserve to know the truth and they deserve to not be lied to and they deserve to not have their lives affected by people capable of doing exactly the opposite of a Christian.
And yes, we all sin – but it’s HOW you deal with that sin, that matters.
Lies, corruption, in-house covers ups, further abuse. That is not how to deal with your sins.