I am not shy in saying, I think many church people are as, or more messed up, than non church goers.
Too much ego, too much pride, too much asking for money, too much bickering, too many rules, too much religion, not enough wisdom, too much apathy, too much abuse, too much spiritual/emotional abuse, too much cheap grace, too much ‘you have to do this our way’, too much shallow crap, too much believing they are superior to others, too many ‘cliques’, far too many that are actually not Christians at all, too many pew warmers and don’t even get me started on the ministers.
Of course, each church will deny this.
I have neither the capacity, or the desire, to participate in all this.
Have I had great examples of churches and church people. No.
Do I think they are all this way. No.
I do think they are mostly only for average people, and not for those healing very traumatic lives – in my experience – church is the last place to go for that.
Do I have the energy, or the need to keep looking, until I find one, led by someone I can trust, where I will feel safe, feel my family is safe. No.
“Christianity’ is a mess. Anyone who believes differently, is deluded, in denial, very naïve, or brainwashed.
Most churches and church people are NOTHING, like they were in the 1st Century.
I am thankful there are some amazing, mature Christians, trying to help all the ones who have no clue.
But, I do not have the gifts right now, to do that. My healing, my PTSD, my family, preserving my life – are all more important than other people right now. And it is not selfish to say that.
Anyone who says that is wrong – are you God?