Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.


5 Comments

Social media brings all the trolls out to play.

Social media is a playground for the narcissistic sociopathic trolls who use their fake aliases to troll their crap.

They are attracted to my page, where they dislike truth, know many are vulnerable.

There is usually one at any time on my page.

They don’ t realise how obvious they are to anyone with psychology understanding. They have no self insight, no empathy, no remorse. But the ones faking being a charity, not fot profit org, christian, etc, will pretend to have empathy and reveal how they in fact have none, when pushed.

I think it is so sad to have that level of insanity that you have no self insight.

And it is a level of insanity. Moral and mental insanity.

 


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Possible plans for the future.

I have some ideas for the future I would like to accomplish, should they be my life journey.

I want to volunteer in child protection, where the rights of children and being a voice for them, to reduce child sexual abuse, is a priority.

I want to go to Nepal and help street children, as every child needs someone to care about them unconditionally.

I want to write a book on what I have learned in my healing journey, to help more survivors.

I want to educate society about what to do and what not do/say to complex trauma survivors.

I want to specifically educate church people to stop enabling abusers, not have cheap grace and stop abusing people with the bible.

I want to write a book about abuse and narcissism in church  ministry. I have a title ‘Is he praying, or preying? A survivors guide to healing from narcissistic ministers’

I think that might be enough for now.

If it’s meant to be, it will happen.


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No, I do not need to be society’s selfish idea of strong.

Society tells prolonged abuse survivors to ‘get over it, move on, it’s all in the past – forget about it.’ Yeah developing amnesia, suppressing the pain is exactly what we do NOT need. Please stop speaking or voicing any opinion until you have been educated in psychology, and develop insight. Or a heart.

No, society does not have an entitlement to an opinion on how severe abuse survivors heal, how they should feel, what they should think about their abusers.

Their opinion is usually completely judgmental, uneducated, lacking in insight, lacking in empathy and often what makes ‘them’ feel better, not for the good of the victim.

Most people in life are inherently selfish, and it is naive to believe otherwise.

Few people regularly or naturally put others before themselves. 

Few people do anything without it being about self.

Some delude themselves, pretend – I have seen this in action repeatedly, especially amongst church people. Non church people tend to be more honest about their selfishness, church people hide it, pretend more so they look like good christians. But, I see through it.

Most people don’t want to hear about horrendous abuse, child abuse, taboo uncomfortable subjects, so just want survivors to get over it quickly and quietly, to make their own lives easier. The survivors needs not even given much thought.

I know how hurtful and invalidating this is.

I keep anyone like this out of my life, while I am healing.

It is self care, boundaries and needed.

I am strong, every day, for however long it takes to heal, no matter how many tears, how many times I feel suicidal, no matter how many times I cry, feel depressed, how long I grieve.

I don’t need society to validate my emotional courage. I have it in bucket loads.

I hope this helps someone struggling with this.

Please don’t listen to society.


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Healing complex trauma for me, is not about becoming an average person.

I think too many people believe healing is about being morphed into your average non severe trauma person.

I don’t want to be an average person, I have seen far too many average people messing up this world, lacking self insight, lacking deep self honesty, lacking empathy, lacking wisdom, with far too much selfishness and ego.

I accept we are all different, but no, I do not aspire to be any of that.

I definitely do not aspire to be your average church person, who have all these issues too, but often a sense of false superiority over others they in no way should feel entitled to have. 

I am no better than anyone, but I am not average. I haven’t had an average life compared to most of society around me either. 

I know my strengths, I know my weaknesses, I know when I sin, I can be bluntly honest about myself.

I am never going to be average, thank goodness.

Mental health professionals often want to turn people into someone average, you know ‘normal’. For some complex trauma survivors, who have greater life wisdom, and have gifts due to their life, that is asking the person to go backwards, not heal.

I need to learn how to deal with society’s mental health issues they mostly have no insight into, in a way that does not affect my wisdom and integrity, without enabling bad/unwise/abusive behaviour and without becoming apathetic.

Currently, I need to focus on me and my healing and I share my journey, so others don’t feel alone and because my empathy, compassion and heart for others suffering, continues to grow. It’s why I am protective of my community members not getting harmed by others, because I care.

I have never been average, as many have pointed out throughout my life, and I never will be.

Don’t allow anyone to try and make you their idea of who you should be. Grow, heal through it, accept your gifts, be very honest with yourself – good and bad, listen only to wise advice and don’t accept toxic in your life.

Have compassion and empathy, but don’t allow that to be greater than wisdom.

Question what everyone says, question your own thoughts, motivation as well. This is maturity.

Have boundaries, which may need to be different, at different times in your life.

Don’t follow the crowd, they are often going the wrong way.

Above all, don’t be average, if you know you are not.

 


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Ignore the troll on my facebook page – Nefertari/Abortion page admin/LisaMarie

It is clear this person is the same person, using different aliases, as sociopathic people do.

No boundaries, lack of empathy, entitlement to vent opinions about forgiveness in a highly inappropriate manner, no insight.

Let her vent away, embarass herself.

As was pointed out by Ali, use this as an example of what narcissistic, sociopaths do, when their ego’s are hurt with the truth.

The internet is sadly full of these abusive trolls, who don’t know when to shut up.

The troll will be gone, banned, reported when I am back on there.

Until then, ignore her and as someone said – don’t feed the trolls.

 

So far this woman claims to be a licensed therapist, a one woman charity and a literal genius. Wow. Narcissist! Grandiose self perception on full display. 

I feel sad for her, she needs help.