It has become very clear to me lately, that my need for someone, anyone, to understand me, is great. I’ve been seeking that, my entire life.
But, no-one will.
My life has been too complex, for anyone to understand who I am. And I can’t expect anyone to, not my husband, not my doctor, not anyone.
They can’t. They haven’t lived my life. They haven’t endured all the pain. Their understanding is limited by their own lives, their own personal life experiences, which are different to mine. No-one understands what they haven’t personally endured.
It is unfair of me, to expect anyone, to understand me, except Jesus.
But, everyone needs a person, someone to talk to, who verbally speaks backs understanding.
I will never have that, in my earthly lifetime.
It really fucking hurts, more than I can express. But, the stuff that always hurts me the most, is the stuff I need to accept and deal with, the most. No matter how painful.
It makes me feel more lonely and isolated and withdrawn and hopeless, then ever.
A lifetime of validation seeking – and I will never have it, from anyone human.
Wow. Deeply painful. More than I can express.
Numbing out happening now.
May 27, 2014 at 12:52 am
You’ve summed up so well much of how I feel.
May 27, 2014 at 1:16 am
I am so sorry you feel this too. It’s a painful place to be in. I really do understand, so know that ❤
May 27, 2014 at 1:44 am
Its true what u saying i think u say it well but also remember there are lots of us out here who are with u daily …holding u tightly , walking along side u listening ..sending lots of love lisa
May 27, 2014 at 8:24 am
Thank you, that is so kind of you to remind me of this.
Lots of love to you too Lisa ❤
May 29, 2014 at 4:54 am
take care xxxx
May 27, 2014 at 7:07 am
I so relate to this one.
May 27, 2014 at 8:24 am
I’m sorry you understand and relate to this, because I don’t want anyone to feel this pain.
Please know, I understand though and I know how much it hurts.
❤
May 27, 2014 at 9:13 am
I have felt that all my life so far and it looks it never ends…
May 27, 2014 at 1:15 pm
I really do understand how much this hurts, but I have to believe it can change.
If I think it can’t, or won’t ever change, my thoughts spiral down to dangerous places.
❤
May 27, 2014 at 3:26 pm
Validation from other humans….rare.
May 28, 2014 at 3:44 am
Yes, it is rare. Which is why I try so hard to validate people on my community page.
I haven’t had the worst trauma in life, by far, but I have suffered deeply, so I try and validate the pain of this for others.
Lack of validation, and particularly invalidation, is painful.
❤