Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.

I used to like this quote, now I don’t.


“Someone I loved once gave me a box full of darkness. It took me years to understand that this too, was a gift.”

― Mary Oliver

I used to like this quote. It made me ‘feel’ better about all the pain and abuse. That’s the purpose of the quote, to make you feel better. Put a positive spin on all the bad.

What this quote does, is say evil – abuse – is okay. To say child abuse, child sexual abuse, is okay – a gift. No it isn’t.

To call abuse a ‘gift’ – is celebrating evil.

I don’t do that, my faith had progressed further now.

I celebrate God for helping me endure the evil, that was in NO way a gift, and helping me to create strength, courage and insight and a heart to help others.

I will never celebrate evil, never thank abusers, never condone abuse.

God never ‘gives’ us evil to endure. Evil and sinful people do that.

But Jesus will use that evil – He absolutely does not want us to endure – and create something good for His purposes.

To suggest evil is a gift, or that God wants us to endure evil – is wrong.

That is saying God likes evil, or God has evil in Him. Like He is a sociopath, who will choose evil and harm to His children and say – ‘well they need it/deserve it’.

There is no evil in God, He is perfect pure love.

Evil, abuse, are never a gift.

Jesus is a gift. Our own courage is a gift. God is a perfect gift that I praise every day.

But, I will never praise evil, abuse or abusers.

I won’t praise evil, to make myself feel better.

Author: Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

I am a survivor of complex and multiple trauma and abuse, who at the age of 40, began my healing journey. I am using my journey to recovery and healing, to help others, to help survivors feel less alone, validated, encouraged and to enable others to understand themselves more. Complex trauma, particularly from severe, prolonged childhood abuse, is profoundly life changing. Complex trauma produces complex adults. The journey to recovery is a painful, often lonely, emotional daily challenge and it is my aim to encourage others in their daily battle. ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

2 thoughts on “I used to like this quote, now I don’t.

  1. I agree…abuse/darkness is not any kind of gift…maybe what we learn from it, or that it can send us to our knees is good that comes…but the darkness=not a gift. Light=gift

  2. Sometimes I wonder why some individuals perceive life as a GAME SHOW. At the beginning of your LIFE, your given a question! Would you take the avenue of DETRIMENT or DETRIMENT FREE? If life was that simple! NO GIFT!