Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.

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Socially Conservative Views, Linked To The Dark Triad: Machiavellianism, Narcissism and Psychopathy.

Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

Wow, I knew this, but did not know they had done studies on this.

More of my personal understanding of humanity, validated by research and studies, through neuroethics.

Neurobiology is very interesting.

This link is VERY interesting, for anyone who understands narcissism, sociopaths and psychopathy, as I do, having been on the receiving end of their abuse.



This is how so many have such lack of empathy and lack of regard for humanity and are unable to understand the harm, their views, decision and behaviours cause.

It’s why so many conservative politicians, like Australia’s current Prime Minister – Tony Abbott, and his good friend Scott Morrison – Immigration Minister, can act in such callous ways to those in need.

It’s why so many hard line right wing Christians, can too act in such callous ways, hating on gay people, spiritually abusing people with their hard line, Bible bashings…

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Poem – Real Daily Suffering of Forgotten People

Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A poem in response to some research on the desperate poverty and ill health, homelessness women and children, of Nepal and many other countries, living in such desperate circumstances.

I can only imagine the mental health and physical health issues, they will be dealing with daily.

BillyScanlan photography

Ragged abused street children
Poor abused women, ignored
By all the rich tourists
Spending their money
On their pleasures
Closing eyes, hearts
To deep pain in the faces
Of so many

Some good hearts
Volunteer, help
These desperate people

Devastating poverty
Suffering etched
Into their beautiful faces

Not how
Any human, any child
Should live in 2014

Rich people worldwide
Ignoring this
Living in luxury
They need more
Entitlement rich
Empathy, compassion poor

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Things I am so thankful my husband has seen & worked out for himself.

I am glad my husband saw my mother and my sisters in action. I am thankful that as embarrassing as it was, he saw the venomous actions of my very mentally ill ‘mother’ and how screwed up both my sisters are, sees how they are both with men who treat them badly, but can’t do any better, saw the messages the youngest sent about kissing the other sisters boyfriend – that’s how they treat each other, how they were both pregnant teenagers, with no career, unable to be independent, no hope of a life, they made the choices to mess up. (talk about acting like victims in life). And my husband thinks they are very jealous of me.

He has told me that he has never seen people act the way they do and he is so amazed I am who I am – coming from a family that in his words are obviously crazy and a mother who is so nasty.

He told me I was stupid to go and see my mother when she was really ill after a stroke and that she deserved nothing from me. He was right. But I did it because I loved her.

I am thankful my husband has seen me deal with other people’s issues and never in a nasty way and that in his opinion, I have too much compassion for people, and forgive people more than I should. He thinks I am too nice.

I am thankful my husband saw me for 10 years, strong, highly functioning, never speaking about my past, working hard, being independent, able to buy my own car and home, showing how I am the last person anyone could ever have called a ‘victim’.

I am thankful my husband sees the hives on my arms, whenever I am stressed out and knows this is relatively new and shows my body is now reacting badly to my anxiety and he knows how real it is.

I am thankful he knows I have put on a brave face in counselling, because he knows I want to be strong all the time and that I am not seeking attention, or I would have already talked about a lot more of my past.

I am also glad that from the little I told him, he knew before I did, that my parents were abusers, who had set me up to be abused, and that it was obvious to him, but could see that I needed to come to terms with everything so slowly.

He has told me that I am the most courageous person he will ever meet.

He doesn’t understand me fully, but I am aware, no-one will.

But, I am thankful he knows me and has witnessed enough himself, to know all this.

And I am thankful that he is doing everything he is capable of, to support me.

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Interesting viewpoints, of my favourite singer-songwriter, Lana Del Rey.

Click to access Vigier-Del-Ray-Clean-Final-18-nov-123.pdf

While I agree with much of what is written in this ^ – I also just personally and deeply relate to much of what she writes/sings about and her videos.

I actually think she is extremely brave to write and sing about the personal issues that have occurred in her life.

And she has reportedly confirmed many times, she does write about her own personal experiences.

She is also a deeply compassionate person, who’s main work, is not singing, it’s helping alcoholics recover.

Yes, she may write about taboo subjects. I applaud her for that.

It takes courage, to be real, in this very fake world.


Why the world wants to make you feel bad for being a ‘victim’.

I read “There is a worldwide view, to have contempt for women who come across as victims.”

I would actually extend this to anyone seen to be a victim, and not acting in society’s twisted version of strong to be viewed with contempt.

When in fact, anyone who has been abused, any child that has been abused, is a victim. And continues to be if the abuse causes long term affects such as PTSD, Complex PTSD, Depression.

The word ‘victim’ has become a really ‘bad’ word and survivors of abuse feel shamed about calling themselves a victim.

It’s common to hear and read ‘stop acting like a victim’ – by very narcissistic people, who lack any level of compassion or empathy, and want to put you down, regardless of whether it hurts you deeply or not.

Many protest and say ‘I am not a victim, I am a survivor” or some other more socially acceptable term.

Victim blaming is becoming a massive epidemic, using the term ‘victim’ even more to cause shame and hate towards people abused – who are in fact ‘victims’.

I see clearly that having Complex PTSD – puts me in an involuntary situation of being a ‘victim’ over and over, with every intrusive memory, every flashback, every nightmare, all the fear induced anxiety, hypervigilance etc.

There is far too much ‘shaming’ going on in this increasingly non compassionate, narcissistic society/world we live in.

I don’t feel ashamed to say – I was a victim of severe abuse, many times and I am still ‘involuntarily’ forced to feel like the victim I was when the abuse was forced upon me, repeatedly – with every Complex PTSD symptom I endure, every single day.

Shame, for how we feel, is a massive issue and a massive barrier to healing, and society and the world, make this worse.

There is no shame, in saying ‘I am a victim of abuse’ and I am still dealing with the consequences caused to my mind, body, heart and soul.

Which was never my fault.

Adding a few comments that were posted onto my Facebook about this…

spot on, as a wise old counsellor once said to me “there is such a taboo around being a victim” This is so symptomatic of what you so rightly describe as a Narcissistic society, where no one wants to see the suffering of others no matter what form it takes, & this is actually fear based behaviour, after all the suffering of others might be contagious. This is actually very primitive & un evolved thinking. When we have to exist & work towards our healing in such a compassionless environment, it shows us very clearly that a big part of our healing is to direct a steady stream of love & compassion towards our selves.

I hadn’t considered it like that. I think it has become like this because there are indeed some narcissists out there who play at being a victim and suck in vulnerable people to manipulate. But I really appreciate your point about it. Just because the word has been abused by the actions of some, it shouldn’t mean the people entitled* to use the word avoid doing so. Interesting point indeed, Lilly.
*and I used the word “entitled” there for lack of a better one.

More responses at https://www.facebook.com/HealingFromComplexTraumaAndPTSDAndCPTSD/posts/663046117115479