Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.

We need to grieve the pain of betrayal, caused by those we deeply loved.

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I have given up expecting anyone to understand the intense pain that comes with grieving the betrayal, of loving people so much, who have caused you so much pain, damage, abuse and harm.

To have both parents be abusers, who set me up to be abused, and then so many after that, has caused wounds so deep, I fear they will never be healed.

My multiple trauma’s are not set out as separate trauma’s on a timeline, independent of each other.

Each one impacted the one before it, until all the trauma’s are heaped on top of each other, causing such heavy and deep wounds, that it is unbearable to deal with the pain.

The impact of multiple trauma’s, from birth, by all the significant people in your life, is beyond cruel.

Author: Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

I am a survivor of complex and multiple trauma and abuse, who at the age of 40, began my healing journey. I am using my journey to recovery and healing, to help others, to help survivors feel less alone, validated, encouraged and to enable others to understand themselves more. Complex trauma, particularly from severe, prolonged childhood abuse, is profoundly life changing. Complex trauma produces complex adults. The journey to recovery is a painful, often lonely, emotional daily challenge and it is my aim to encourage others in their daily battle. ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

One thought on “We need to grieve the pain of betrayal, caused by those we deeply loved.

  1. Possibly my brainwiring changed can never be healed. i do neither feel or love like normal people do. Yet i have made a vow to parent that child within, that lost soulpart as i have never parented before. I even gave up contact with my 3 adult sons, when tested if i would comply with their ultimatums and abort her yet again. I did not. Grief, sadness over the loss of my sons, grandchildren, but also the tranquillity for finally allowing myself to be me. Me as she shows up and sometimes does not show up me lost in dissociation once more. i don’t know where this will lead, but finally i find myself on a path, my path and not trying to handle the world, handle others in how they would want me to be, to react or to act. We still wake up every morning in unbearable sadness after another sleepless night, due to hypervigilance. Tired, sometimes exhausted. Needing some time of Mindfulness to muster the courage to get out of bed, towards some natural supplements that will give me some energy. Yet i observe our physical body not as cramped, not as minimal foetal as it used to me. stretched out, my hands/wrists still in a foetal cramp.