Society promotes the whole ‘focus on a positive attitude’ as being the answer for anything.
Church people like to do focus on ‘count your blessings’.
Neither of these are helpful, or appropriate advice to give to people who are trying to heal severe abuse and trauma. All these do, is avoid suppress, ignore the emotions needed to process the trauma, the emotions needed to grieve. Suppression is never healthy when it comes to abuse and trauma.
How do I know this….because I did it myself for 20 years. And it made my current situation worse.
I did what society and unwise people demand – moved on, got over it, made a life, tried to never think about my past, worked hard, exercised hard, focussed on enjoying myself blah blah blah…
And all that did was suppress the deeply painful emotions and severe trauma, that needed to have been dealt with at the age of 20 yrs old.
But, I had no support, no family so I did what I needed to do to support myself, survive and suppressed it as much as I possible could. Continue reading