Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.

I knew by the lyrics and emotion in her voice, Sia has a story.

I loved Sia her voice, her emotion, her lyrics.

I guessed there was a story behind her talent and music. I can always feel it.


From ^ link.

Furler has suffered from depression. She has said that she suffered from addiction to painkillers and alcohol[69] and had contemplated suicide before, going as far as to write a suicide note.[70]

In June 2010, Furler’s official website announced that all scheduled promotional events and shows had been cancelled due to her poor health.[71] She cited extreme lethargy and panic attacks and considered retiring permanently from performing and touring.[67] According to her Twitter account, she was diagnosed with Graves’ disease – an autoimmune disorder with an over-active thyroid.[67][72] Four months later, in an ARIA Awards interview Furler said her health was improving after rest and thyroid hormone replacement therapy.[73][74]

Sia – Breathe Me. This makes me cry so much.


“Breathe Me”

Help, I have done it again
I have been here many times before
Hurt myself again today
And the worst part is there’s no one else to blame

Be my friend
Hold me, wrap me up
Unfold me
I am small and needy
Warm me up
And breathe me

Ouch I have lost myself again
Lost myself and I am nowhere to be found,
Yeah I think that I might break
I’ve lost myself again and I feel unsafe

Be my friend
Hold me, wrap me up
Unfold me
I am small and needy
Warm me up
And breathe me Continue reading

Sia “I’m In Here”


“I’m In Here”

I’m in here, can anybody see me?
Can anybody help?

I’m in here, a prisoner of history,
Can anybody help?

Can’t you hear my call?
Are you coming to get me now?
I’ve been waiting for,
You to come rescue me,
I need you to hold,
All of the sadness I can not,
Living inside of me.

I’m in here, I’m trying to tell you something,
Can anybody help? Continue reading


Man assaults paedophile who abused his 5 yr old, paedo gets legal aid, man loses home.


I hate society, I really do. I do not belong here. I do not see it through rose coloured glasses like many. The more I see and know and learn, the more I just can’t deal with all the evil I see.

In what decent healthy society, does this occur – a father – who assaults a paedophile – who has been sexually abusing his 5 yr old daughter, paedophile gets legal aid, and father of abused daughter loses his home to pay the paedophiles legal costs.

Un -fucking-believable.

How the hell is that justice? How the hell is that fair? How the hell is that allowed?

The father acted the way any normal father would.

I hate the legal systems which is so clearly set up to protect criminals more than victims of crime.

I hate that sex offenders, paedophiles, rapists etc, get more help and compassion, than their victims. Continue reading

If it weren’t for my children, I would like to die, right now.

Processing the pain of my past and knowing all I do, is more painful than I can even express in writing.

I really would like to die, right now.

I’ve thought about how I would do it, if I didn’t have my children.

I think about it and imagine the pain disappearing out of my heart and soul.

And there just being blackness.

Which is better than this pain.

My children, are the only reason I am alive.

I have to live for them.


I feel such shame when I cry in front of my children. I should be stronger than I am.

Being a good mother is the most important thing to me. I try hard to be happy around them and not be depressed, sad or cry.

Sometimes, my emotions are so high, I can’t control it.

I just cried on front of my 5 year old and now I feel terrible. He was sad and hugged me.

I should be able to not be emotional in front of them. They shouldn’t see my tears.

I feel like a really bad mother.

I need to be stronger than I am.

I hate myself for not being the mother they deserve.