Covert victim blaming ‘You were given this life, because you are strong enough to endure it’.

July 11, 2014 by Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD 5 Comments

I hate this kind of ongoing covert victim blaming.

Society loves it and perpetuates it continually. It is BS and further abuse.

I wrote these two posts about this on my page…

I really dislike the quote ‘you were given this life because you are strong enough to live it’.

Such BS.

This is a form of victim blaming. You are ‘strong enough’ therefore you got it all.

I was given my life – by abusers- and all the abuse in it, ‘regardless’ of whether I am strong enough to live it, or not.

Many people have lives that are too painful to endure. Many end their lives or feel suicidal, that does not mean they are not strong enough.

I wish all these covert forms of victim blaming, did not exist and were not encouraged by society.

Particularly abuse survivors themselves.

And then followed it up with..

Further to my last post about the ‘victim blaming quote’ – ‘You were given this life because you are strong enough to endure it’…

I will also add…..

I do believe ‘some’ can become stronger for it, but that does not in any way mean that is why we had to endure it.

For some, it destroys them completely.

We weren’t ‘given’ it because we are strong enough, at all.

Our abusers didn’t think to themselves ‘I’m only going to hurt her/him, because she/he is strong enough to endure it’. They didn’t care at all, if we were strong enough to endure it. In fact, some abusers wanted the abuse to destroy us.

I don’t like any forms of victim blaming and I won’t tolerate them.

Society is very unhealthy in many of it’s views about abuse and I stand up against them all.

I also dislike and will not tolerate other victim blaming such as;

– Suggesting God ‘gives’ you abuse to in some way teach you something – BS. God is pure perfect love and wants no-one to suffer. But, due to free will, people make choices for others to suffer, and God will use those situations, for His needs, with our best interests always at heart.

– Karma, Laws of Attraction, Buddhism – all forms of victim blaming to suggest you deserve it, need it, encouraged it. BS, all of it.

The blame for abuse is always and only the abusers – they made the choices to abuse. End of.

They also could have chosen, not to abuse. But they didn’t.

There needs to be people willing to speak the truth.