I was abused by an associate church pastor. I did what was needed and told others, others who needed to know.
The only reason a formal investigation occurred, was because I had the guts to post the truth on this blog. My doctor didn’t believe this was the right thing to do at the time and made that very obvious, but it was what led to the formal complaint. So, I know it was the right and needed choice to force an outcome required. It would of all been kept hush hush otherwise.
A mediation occurred, where it became even more obvious to me, the narcissism of this man and his wife, who were only concerned about their image and narc rage clearly on display from the pastor and tears only for herself from the wife.
That led to a formal complaint. The formal complaint went ahead and dragged on for months. I told the three investigators the pastor was a liar, a narcissist, an abuser. I invited all these people into this situation to deal with it appropriately.
All the while, my anxiety and stress was massive, but I did it all anyway, because it was needed. I couldn’t walk away from it and ignore the abuse and the narcissism, which I knew would hurt more people. I knew the truth had to be spoken, no matter how much suffering, it caused me.
These people involved in dealing with all this, all consider themselves intelligent, mature and mature Christians. All will claim to know far more of the Bible than I do. Three of them know about psychology.
Yet they failed to listen to me, failed to understand the seriousness of what I was telling them. And they all collectively failed to deal with this situation appropriately.
That pastor had/has no remorse, no ownership of what he did, no conscience, no repentance. He lied, manipulated, projected, minimized and abused me further.
The report was clearly BS and people know that. My doctor confirmed that. But, nothing has been done and I have known since then, this situation needs taking further. But, what’s the point, when I have no-one with enough insight, or emotional intelligence and spiritual courage to help me deal with this. They were all tested in this, and they all failed.
And now that pastor’s ego is so inflated, that despite all of what occurred and all the harm he knows he caused, all the lies he knows he told, and the complete failure by all those who dealt with this, he is now going to be a senior pastor, in another church.
Another church that will be infected with his lies, his ego, his narcissism and that of his wife, and more harm, more spiritual and emotional abuse will occur and possibly other forms of abuse too.
All in the name of God.
I was 100% right all along. About who and what he is. And I am the only one who cares about this and how this will now affect other people.
And it’s too late now, for people to tell me his promotion ‘is a bad decision by the Baptist Union and by the church’. The time to deal with it, was when the BS investigation report was done.
So yes, I am angry.
Myself and many others, have been let down. Abused. Spiritually abused.
Myself, a whole church full of people, and soon another whole church full of people.
Because no-one would listen to what I was saying and the truth. No-one trusted that my insight and discernment was great, they all believed they knew better than me and their own discernment was greater.
And they are all wrong. And some of them know they were wrong and I was in fact right along.
But, their ego’s and all their ‘abuse minimizing/enabling & perpetrator protecting crap’ all got in the way. And I doubt any one of them would have the balls to admit this, or even see this is what they are doing. They will excuse it, say they see it ‘differently’ blah blah blah. All excuses, as per the rest of society.
All while a narc wolf in sheeps clothing, abuses another church full of people, doing exactly the opposite of what God wants.
I have considered all the things I could do.
But, I am so aware of the corruption and abuse condoning/enabling and mind controlled issues too many church people have, that I am wasting my time.
So, I wash my hands of all of it now, and will just stay well away from them all.
There is no use in talking to people who are so far from your own level of wisdom and maturity and there is no use in talking to people who are absolutely committed to not listening, so warped by their mind controlled issues, ego’s and fear of people who have the spiritual integrity and courage to stand up and actually tell them what they are doing, is really wrong.