Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.

I am thankful my blogs about Pastor A. Allinson, show up at the top on google searches.

1 Comment

I am well aware there are many who would believe that exposing a pastor publicly, is wrong.

I disagree, he had every opportunity given to him to deal with this appropriately and privately – he made his choices to continue lying. And I know my heart in this, I know abuse has occurred over 2 years now, corruption has occurred and I have support about this.

I have deep levels of emotional courage and spiritual integrity. Something I am aware many church people don’t and won’t accept in others, but that doesn’t mean they are right.

I choose to know and see Jesus as my role model, not church people.

Abuse and false teachers should always be exposed and I do have the spiritual integrity and emotional courage to do this – because God is first and foremost in my life and God does not condone lies, abuse, lack of repentance, wolves in sheeps clothing and His word makes that VERY clear.

And this has nothing to do with what some may judgmentally assume, lack of forgiveness, lack of grace etc..

It is about knowing evil is occurring and if this man was just a congregation member, my actions would be very different. This is purely because he is a pastor.

Narcissism, lies, manipulation, abuse, grooming, lack of owning your sins, lack of remorse, lack of empathy, lack of repentance, corruption, whitewashing, projecting, minimizing – should NOT occur in ministry, in roles of power and influence over others.

It’s bad enough he preaches wrongly and has no clue the real meaning of how the Bible is meant to be read, encourages child abuse (harsh physical punishment) and needs his narc ego feeding constantly (which is why he is a minister) – but to be a narcissistic minister – absolutely not okay.

As anyone who has read many of my blogs will be aware, I have considerable empathy for abusive people, personality disorders, and there is no doubt about my capacity for this – including my abusers. I wish them no harm at all, have never sought retribution, have prayed for them and want them to have eternal life with Jesus. But I don’t believe in ignoring their abuse, cheap grace (which is of Satan), and this situation is serious, because this man is a pastor.

I am not apathetic about abuse like so many are and spiritual abuse has an added level of harm and especially from a minister.

Abuse, particularly from ministers is more common than realised and I am not okay with that. My soul is deeply troubled by that.

I am also deeply trouble by the corruption that has clearly gone on within the higher ranks of the Baptist Church and lies being told in the internal investigation report, are proof of that, which again, I have support about.

I realise deeply, that cheap grace is a massive issue in Christianity and is of Satan, not of God and allows abuse and harm to continue on – absolutely not okay and Satan’s delight.

My heart and reasons, I am secure in and actually have little to do with how I have been deeply affected – but for all those will continue to be affected by a narc minister and narc ministers wife, who are emotional and spiritual bullies/abusers, who are incapable of changing and owning their issues, pathological liars, due to their hurt ego’s and deep issues, both of which I see clearly come from their own unhealthy childhoods and lack of bonding with their own parents (which is a big cause of narcissism).

Bottom line, narcissism exists, but it has no place in ministry. It is the opposite of Jesus.

And narcissism is rarely healed, because they can’t accept what they have.

Just because so many other people are acting so badly, and others are being fooled and being deceived – doesn’t mean I am, or that I should ignore this and walk away.

Anyone who believes corruption and narcissism and abuse only occurs in ‘other’ churches and ‘other’ denominations, is very naïve, very deceived.

The Bible warns us very clearly about wolves in sheeps clothing, false teachers and how Satan can use anyone.

Author: Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

I am a survivor of complex and multiple trauma and abuse, who at the age of 40, began my healing journey. I am using my journey to recovery and healing, to help others, to help survivors feel less alone, validated, encouraged and to enable others to understand themselves more. Complex trauma, particularly from severe, prolonged childhood abuse, is profoundly life changing. Complex trauma produces complex adults. The journey to recovery is a painful, often lonely, emotional daily challenge and it is my aim to encourage others in their daily battle. ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

One thought on “I am thankful my blogs about Pastor A. Allinson, show up at the top on google searches.

  1. I agree with you about exposing those that hold a place of leadership. If they wont repent and get help, then they should be exposed to protect others from the same pain inflicted on you.
    Its a brave thing to do…..I tried standing up for what was right and expose inapropriate teaching…no one else would…eventually I had to leave for my well being…later found out I wasnt the only one seeing the problems…but they were affraid to speak up.
    Glad there are people like you to stand in the gap.