There’s no getting away from the harsh reality, that doing the right thing, over the last few years, having courage, was a complete waste of time.
All it did was lead to me enduring more trauma and abuse, having to deal with so many lies, corruption, evil. No-one dealt with it any of it appropriately, no-one else stepped up, so evil prevailed.
It wasn’t worth it, all the harm it caused me. That is the harsh reality. Humans cause harm to others, in many ways.
And I have that nagging knowledge that I was so stupid to think anything different would occur.
Why would I ever put my trust in people. Why? It’s like I have the masochistic need to keep proving to myself, again and again, that people can never be trusted.
All the harm, to me, to my healing, was not worth doing the right thing.
Maybe this was the lesson, all along. Don’t bother.