Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.

Love -v- Rescue. I know I have had issues with this.

This often doesn’t stop after childhood either and the victim/child, who was conditioned into this, will continue this throughout adulthood with others.

I’ve done this, I did it in my first marriage. I kept forgiving and therefore, enabling his abuse to me. He was a narc, and an alcoholic and gambling addict to boot. I was abused in many ways – emotionally, physically, financially (I paid all the bills so he could use his for booze and betting). He was always going to ‘change’, and never did. I felt overly responsible for ‘rescuing’ him and guilty if I ‘gave up’ and him and he would pile on the emotional abuse, to make me feel guilty.

I have had a lot of experience of dealing with narcs and how they behave and all their abusive ways.

This is why I do NOT believe in ‘just showing compassion and forgiving’ narcissists, because it is enabling them and it is dangerous with an unrepentant narcissist.

This is why I have issues with some foolish church people’s approach and assuming cheap grace for a narc, is okay. It isn’t. It is dangerous.

I am aware I still have issues with feeling overly responsible for other people’s issues.

Which is why I have now walked away from the whole spiritual abuse hell, I have endured for the last few years. Everyone involved failed, so why do I feel responsible for it? I did everything I should and was subjected to continual abuse throughout it. All those so called mature ‘Christians’ failed – which is not my responsibility – it’s theirs and the sins lie with them. They had the opportunity to do something and they didn’t.

I won’t take responsibility for other people’s shit anymore.  

Author: Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

I am a survivor of complex and multiple trauma and abuse, who at the age of 40, began my healing journey. I am using my journey to recovery and healing, to help others, to help survivors feel less alone, validated, encouraged and to enable others to understand themselves more. Complex trauma, particularly from severe, prolonged childhood abuse, is profoundly life changing. Complex trauma produces complex adults. The journey to recovery is a painful, often lonely, emotional daily challenge and it is my aim to encourage others in their daily battle. ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

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