Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.

Exposing an abuser and taking legal action….is actually in the abusers best interests.


I know abuse is increasing. I’ve done my research. I know a lot about why. I know a lot about abusive types of people.

Abuse, is evil. I don’t tolerate abuse. I don’t condone abuse. I don’t enable abuse. This is more evil.

This does *not* mean I do not have compassion for the reasons abusers, abuse.

I have blogged about my compassion for abusers, their mental health issues, and how I wish I could change them, heal them,  for ‘their’ sakes, as well as their victims.

But, that isn’t reality, and I know the reality, that abusers – abuse and abuse is increasing and this is not okay.

I believe in exposing abusers. Not for revenge. Not for retribution. But to help stop abuse from continuing, because for those with those certain personality disorders/traits and disorders like paedophilia, they will continue abusing. And only a fool, trusts them to stop.

I believe in going to the police and legal action being taken. Because, it is necessary to try to stop abusers, make them face their actions, to inform those, who need to know – especially the police, to have the information necessary to deal with it legally and as appropriately, as possible.

This is not about lack of forgiveness. Some will try to say it is.

Forgiveness – is never meant to be about ignoring abuse,

and avoiding dealing with it appropriately.

And forgiveness is not about blindly trusting them to stop.

Or accepting, what you know is a false apology.

Forgiveness, is not about cheap grace.   

This is not about revenge either. But some like to believe it is. Probably because that’s what their own minds. Or they have some unhealthy need themselves, to want to allow abusers, to continue abusing.

Yes, there are people who want revenge and I know that comes from a deep place of hurt and anger.

But, not everyone is ‘all about revenge’ when they choose to expose, and/or take legal action against an abuser.

Some do this for the right reasons, that are about empathy for future victims. To help protect people and help protect children. And to not want the trauma of abuse to keep increasing.

There is also a point that many miss in all this.

Exposing an abuser, dealing with them legally –

stops them from abusing at that time and

gives them the opportunity to confess,

have remorse & repentance.

So, it is actually helping them.

It is allowing them a time period to deal with their wrongs/sins/abuse and put it right. Unlikely in most cases, but there are a few, who will. So, it actually in their best interests, too.

It is the only opportunity these people with

these severe mental health issues,

will be confronted with, to stop, and change.

To heal their own issues.

Enabling them, with cheap grace, or apathy,

or self serving motivations,

is only aiding them to continue abusing.

That is *not* in the abusers best interests.

It is simply colluding, with evil.

I fully support anyone who needs to expose their abuser. Who goes to the police. Who reports to the boss in work. Who tells the church…etc.

I wish people would not always assume, that exposing an abuser, is about revenge, is about retribution.

Those assumptions, are further abuse, to the victim.

Author: Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

I am a survivor of complex and multiple trauma and abuse, who at the age of 40, began my healing journey. I am using my journey to recovery and healing, to help others, to help survivors feel less alone, validated, encouraged and to enable others to understand themselves more. Complex trauma, particularly from severe, prolonged childhood abuse, is profoundly life changing. Complex trauma produces complex adults. The journey to recovery is a painful, often lonely, emotional daily challenge and it is my aim to encourage others in their daily battle. ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

2 thoughts on “Exposing an abuser and taking legal action….is actually in the abusers best interests.

  1. Reblogged this on Narc Bait Diary – Ex Files and commented:
    Its not about revenge…