Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.

I am so OVER people making excuses for abusers.


I am very sensitive about his now.

As soon as I sense anyone, is heading down the ‘excuses’ ‘justification’ ‘abuser protecting’ road….

I avoid them like the plague. I will just block, delete and ignore them.

I live in reality. I know the reality, I have endured too many abusive people. They knew what they were doing, they knew it was wrong. They made choices. The lied. They denied.

And they fucked up my entire life with severe abuse over decades.

So right now, if anyone wants to start flaunting their views contrary to this, in my face….I either want to cry, start feeling fear, or want to tell them that their views are further abuse to me and how dare they feel entitled to do that and go try developing some empathy. The latter doesn’t happen often, because there is no point. They won’t listen anyway.

Why I am so sensitive about this.

Because I have dealt with this crap MY ENTIRE FUCKING LIFE.

Including recently from a pile of weak, pathetic, abusive, church perpetrator protectors.

I don’t have to tolerate people’s ignorance, lack of insight, re-traumatizing abuse survivors, desire to live in denial, minimizing abuse to make it seem more ‘palatable’, cheap grace, making excuses for abusers, enabling abusers, perpetrator protecting, or believe any other shit they choose that makes ‘their’ lives easier.

And I won’t.

Author: Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

I am a survivor of complex and multiple trauma and abuse, who at the age of 40, began my healing journey. I am using my journey to recovery and healing, to help others, to help survivors feel less alone, validated, encouraged and to enable others to understand themselves more. Complex trauma, particularly from severe, prolonged childhood abuse, is profoundly life changing. Complex trauma produces complex adults. The journey to recovery is a painful, often lonely, emotional daily challenge and it is my aim to encourage others in their daily battle. ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

4 thoughts on “I am so OVER people making excuses for abusers.

  1. Gosh I would love to do coffee with you!!! ❤

  2. I have C-PTSD and I am 25. I dedicate so much time and energy for people and always feel like I never get anything in return, so I hate them for not being compassionate and being self-centered. But I think my way of healing the trauma was to first be compassionate and forgive them even when they don’t deserve and also let them know everything of what kind of misreable inhuman persons they are. Ofcourse you will feel happy, not because you hate them and lack empathy but because you had a chance to express yourself. Things get complicated while expressing yourself so think of everything and make a script, then rehearse and approach without fear. Good thing about PTSD and C-PTSD is it could sometimes give you incredible amount of courage. I believe in God, at least try to. I have a different understanding of God. I think if I can be compassionate and forgive people who abused me then God will be left with no choice but to be compassionate towards me. If you think you can’t believe in God, still forgiving people can reduce the hatred. Letting them know how you feel gives you reassurance. Correct me if I am wrong. I’m just in a good mood now, although I felt really bad and suicidal almost entire day and did not had money to do drugs or alcohol. It’s not easy to forgive and move on, but how hard can it be.

    • I am so sorry you were feeling suicidal, I do understand how that feels and how painful it is ❤ I hope you are feeling okay now?

      Please know, whatever we are feeling at that time, is how we feel and I am not in anyway invalidating that, but it is always lies. We do deserve to live and heal and find peace and healing. How to deal with those times when I am not able to say this to myself, is a learning process within my healing. Reaching out for help is always needed ❤

      I am a Christian and I know He loves us all and He is compassionate to us all, whether we forgive or not yet and is only concerned with what is in our hearts and He knows what we have endured.

      I dedicate too much time to others, and whilst this is done with good intentions, I am aware it is not good boundaries or self care.

      Lilly ❤