Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.


I know going to the hospital with acute mental health services, is needed. But..

Had to go to the public hospital that has an acute services department for mental health, today. Never been before. Didn’t believe I would ever need to either. But, I was wrong.

They were nice. Had to wait ages, as in any public hospital for emergencies.

The mental health nurse was pleasant. Had to talk about what has happened over the last few months, to make my emotional state lower. Told her I nearly ended my life several weeks back, and now I don’t feel safe to be alone. Told her I had a big row with my husband and I can’t handle people lying to me and these things push me over the edge.

I feel like I’m just treading water and it take very little for me to start going under.

Explained I have had to process horrific things about my past and my parents and the abuse I endured and I know I haven’t dealt with the pain of all that yet. I haven’t dealt with how I feel about my mother being complicit in it. Continue reading

Decades of abuse & it being ‘all about the abusers’. It’s still ‘all about them’.

Another important message people need to know.
Society hurts abuse victims/survivors repeatedly and this needs to stop.

Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

Further to a blog I wrote earlier, the invalidation abuse prolonged sufferers receive from others, is very damaging.

So, here’s a bit more of why.

I’ve had prolonged abuse, from birth, abused by parents who deliberately and intentionally turned me into a child sexual abuse victim, and I have been groomed, repeatedly and forced into abuse, including considerable sexual abuse, as a child and as an adult.

During this, everything was about the abusers. All of them. What they wanted, what they decided to do, how they wanted to hurt me, about their dark needs etc…And all the while, I wasn’t allowed to protest, to say no, to complain, to voice my emotions. There was never any consideration about me, how I felt, the pain I endured.

Because of all this severe abuse, severe suffering, severe pain, once I was 20, and moved away from family, away from all those…

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Invalidation, enforcing feeling ‘sorry for the abuser’ – leads to more shame, more trauma.

This is such an important message people, religion, everyone needs to know.

Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

I see this all the time, in the media, on social media, within society, within Church people, even in my own Christian counselling.

This happens all the time, everywhere.

People/society/Christianity – all programmed to ‘not think the worst’ about an abuser, ‘look for the good’, assume the victim is lying/exaggerating and minimize what you haven’t personally endured.

I’ve been ‘invalidated’ (not intentionally) in counselling, because it is Christian based, and they can be the worst for avoiding the worst possible reality about someone’ bad’.

When the victim, is being very honest, as most are, all this does is completely invalidate what that victim has endured and re-traumatises that victim over and over.

How is a victim of severe abuse, prolonged abuse meant to process everything deeply and fully, when the focus is to be concerned about how the ‘abuser’ feels, and by others assuming the abuser ‘didn’t know they were…

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