Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.


75 Ways People Say “I *don’t* want to hear about how you’re really feeling”


(75 things people should *not* say – because this is about the self serving needs of the person saying it, and not at all for the needs of person who they are saying it to).

1.Oh, it’s not so bad.
2.It’s all good.
3.Cheer up.
4.Just let it go.
5.Things will get better.
6.Take a few deep breaths.
7.Don’t worry, you’ll feel better.
8.C’mon, you’re okay.
9.Move on.
10.Forgive and forget.
11. Life’s too short to worry about this.
12.There’s nothing you can do now.
13.You can’t change it, so why worry?
14.The past is the past.
15.Don’t dwell.
16.There’s no point fretting over it.
17.It’s not worth it.
18.You shouldn’t ruminate.
19.You’re only going to make it worse by complaining.
20.If you focus on the negative, you’ll be miserable.

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This is why I help people.


Only another broken, alone person, knows how this feels.

Only another heart shattered by so much abuse and fear, can understand how this feels.

Only someone tragically desperate for a home, for somewhere to belong, can understand how this feels.

Only someone who has never been loved, can understand how this feels.

Only someone who knows how it feels to have a huge hole in your heart and soul, where family are meant to reside, knows this suffering.

Tears are falling, as the pain of enduring this all my life, that gut wrenching pain always just under the surface, swells and washes over me, like waves of grieving sadness.

I help others, because I don’t want anyone to feel this alone.

There is no greater pain than decades of abuse and terminal aloneness, with a complete lack of any hope for life to improve and just waiting for death, to release the pain.

This made me LOL! As a chronic insomnia sufferer, it is good to see the humour, when able.


I saw this on Facebook, and I nearly spat my coffee at my laptop screen!

It is good to see humour whenever possible.

Some days – nothing is funny, I am in too much emotional and psychological pain, to feel humour.

But, humour, when able to be felt, can make life far more bearable for those of us, that have suffered a lot.

And humour is good, as long as it is not narcissistic humour.


My innner child’s face, when someone upsets me in an irritating way.


This is how I feel inside sometimes.

I put this on my Inner Child Healing page @ https://www.facebook.com/healingcomplextraumainnerchild and people laughed and liked it, because it is really cute.

I love this child’s face. So adorable.

This is probably exactly what I looked like a few weeks ago (only not cute like this), when I went to counselling and was not happy with my counsellor. I could feel myself literally sulking and pouting like this.


Well, at least I have the guts to admit it !


1 Comment

Narcissism, narcissism, I see it everywhere…shaming people for being ‘sensitive’, calling people names.


Ouch – there is a whole heap of ‘labelling’ and ‘shaming’ right there.

Yes, I agree political correctness can go too far, but it is needed.

But there is nothing wrong with being sensitive.

Narcissists love to use this term and put others down for being ‘over-sensitive’. I’ve heard this all my life from my family and I see clearly with all my research how society embraces many aspects of narcissistic attitudes.

Empathy and considering other people’s needs, is not common.

All this poster is doing – is putting people down in a nasty, unnecessary way, to raise up own ego.

Calling people ‘pansies’ is bullying.

‘Humourising’ and ‘normalising’ bullying and covert narcissism, is a huge issue in society.

And that society…..is all narcissism.

Wise enough to know…when I’m not wise enough.

Wrote this on my Lilly Hope Lucario FB page..

As we were waiting outside my 5 year olds classroom this morning, another mother speaking to her 5 year old son..

“If you keep messing I’m gonna smack ya and all your friends will see and they’ll all laugh at ya”.

Then she looked at me and smiled, as if she thought what she said was funny and I was going to smile back. It took every ounce of strength in me to not say to her..

“Do you realise how emotionally and psychologically abusive it is to say that to your child and that smacking is physical abuse, as per neuroscience and child development/psychology.”

I think my facial response, was probably enough for her to realise, I didn’t agree or think what she said was amusing.

Poor parenting, is the cause of much harm, abuse and mental health in the world.

Several responses were stated including how some would have said something anyway and too many ignore abuse, which is do understand but this was my response..

Yes, too many do turn a blind eye to child abuse. I think if she had hit him, I would of probably said something.

I’m also aware that in the moment of what occurred, my emotions became heightened, and I will react in an annoyed way – which will only annoy her and not have any positive affect. And I wouldn’t want to say something just to relieve ‘my’ annoyance, I would only want to speak in a way that would actually help the child.
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