Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.


Don’t improve on being an asshole….improve with healthy virtues needed to improve the world.

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There is so much unwise information and advice in society, all about encouraging being who you are, regardless of whether that is an asshole, or a decent person.

Hardly wise advice is it?

A society that values ego above all else, so highly emotionally abandoning, with rapidly increasing narcissism, and decreasing empathy…and sadly it appeals to the darker sides of so many people.

I can only put out there the advice I know is needed.

It is what my willing heart and soul are working on myself and I have changed massively over the last 2 decades. I have more work to do and I want to be the best person I can be, with the right virtues needed and teach those to my children.

I have had to face and still am facing many of my own issues, with the courage for vulnerability required to do this, as facing our own darkness within and be willing to give it up and expel it, is the only way to make room to take in light. Continue reading


Lack of empathy and so much narcissism…..all over Miley Cyrus’ Facebook page.

I just read a whole load of nasty comments and cyber bullying, on Miley Cyrus’ Facebook page and they disgust me.

People have such a lack of empathy for others and such a great need to bully. And some of these people consider themselves nice people. And yet their lack of emotional maturity, is staggeringly obvious to me. They have no idea how poor mental health it is – to be narcissistic and put others down – to raise up own ego.

In my 20’s, I had behaviours that resulted in me being called everything – slag, slut etc. And I agree they are unhealthy, and should not be encouraged as okay.

But, there were deeply rooted & profound psychological reasons for why I had no self worth, and allowed myself to be treated badly, wore certain clothing and participated in behaviours that were very risky, very unhealthy. And I had no-one around me, to model healthy behaviour, or encourage healthy behaviour.

People can say what they like about my life then, ‘shame’ me, call me a slag, slut, skank, whatever…..I am no longer ashamed of what I did.

We live in such a Shaming, and Bullying society.

Continue reading


How Long Have I Felt Alone?

This profound sense of alone is something many prolonged child abuse sufferers, can feel. I feel completely alone.

Together We Heal

Feeling Alone, it’s a familiar feeling. It’s altogether too familiar. As a survivor of Childhood Sexual Abuse (CSA), I struggled for decades with it. I had it twisted around me like a straight-jacket of discomfort. The result was a never-ending quest for love and acceptance in all the wrong places with none of the right people.

This desperate pursuit eventually had me asking many questions about myself and my life.

Is that why I spent so many years seeking intimacy through empty sexual encounters?

Is that why I would take enough narcotics to drop a work mule and then get out on the road looking for party after party, person after person, hook-up after hook-up, connection after connection.

After I reread that last sentence it dawned on me. It’s that’s word, “connection”. I was looking for a true connection but in the most vile of environments, from the…

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