Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.

I’m not a people person, and I don’t have to be.



I have accepted I am not a people person. Not because I don’t like people, or don’t care about them. I just don’t want to interact with most people.

There are those who will say this is wrong. We were created to be interactive with people. Be part of groups. Be social.

Well, I’m not. Good or bad, that is the way it is.

I’m done with interacting with people. Bottom line.

I feel like I have lived 10 lifetimes of dealing with people, mostly bad stuff.

I used to think I would be a counsellor, as I do deeply want abuse survivors, to have good counselling. But, I accept this is not my path. I don’t have what’s needed to interact with people on a daily basis.

I don’t want to be around people. Not because I hate them, or dislike them, or think their differences to me are bad. I just don’t want to interact with people anymore than I absolutely have to.

And there are no ‘rules’ that say I have to.

If I spend the rest of my life, raising my family, working on my own healing, writing, listening to music, feeling safe and content in my home….who can say that is wrong and not okay?

I’m an introvert, a loner and I know this now.

I don’t like society. I don’t like seeing negative stuff I see all the time. It is who I am. And I have fully accepted that.

Maybe it will change. I can’t say it won’t. But right now….I am okay with being me.

Very introverted. Needing to be in my safe place. Doing what makes me feel safe. And blocking out anything that feels unsafe,  all the bullshit society perpetuates, and everyone else’s issues.

I’ve dealt with other people’s issues all my life.

I’m done with it.


And even on my Facebook page, I have now set a few people to ‘aquaintances’ because I don’t like what they promote and I don’t like their view on life as I see it is very unhealthy. I don’t want to offend them by un-liking them, but I don’t want them seeing my posts and I don’t want to see theirs. So I post now as friends except aquaintances.

My life is easier, when I don’t have to see/read other people’s issues.

Author: Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

I am a survivor of complex and multiple trauma and abuse, who at the age of 40, began my healing journey. I am using my journey to recovery and healing, to help others, to help survivors feel less alone, validated, encouraged and to enable others to understand themselves more. Complex trauma, particularly from severe, prolonged childhood abuse, is profoundly life changing. Complex trauma produces complex adults. The journey to recovery is a painful, often lonely, emotional daily challenge and it is my aim to encourage others in their daily battle. ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

5 thoughts on “I’m not a people person, and I don’t have to be.

  1. Great Blog! I too am a person who needs to be in the safety of my home and only with people with which I feel safe. I live a somewhat solitary life working on my reading and writing and loving my husband and nieces and nephews. I have accepted that I find it very difficult to be outside my home and to be with people in general.
    Glad there is someone else who does the same thing.

    • I think it is needed to know who we are and what we need and are comfortable with, and not have anyone else, or society tell us what we need to be.

      I do want to help people, so I do that the way I feel safe, online.

      I want contact with a small group of people I have things in common with and similar understanding of life, and I do that online.

      It is what is comfortable for me and safe. And that matters to me, and since taking this view and blocking out most of the world and all people who cause any discomfort in my life, not needing to have small talk, or discuss things that are not worth talking about to me, I am more settled.

      So, if this is what we need, to be at home, doing our own thing, that is okay.

  2. Well said,and you are a councillor of a a kind,your a therapist,my therapist,I must tell you by reading your posts I am really benefiting,finding my true self and by recognising the similarities I’m begining to feel im ok,it’s all them others.i just want to encourage you to keep on keeping on and although we have been through hell at least we have access to healing and the realisation that we can and are healing,we are blessed,truly we are coz we are on the mend and the best is yet to come,so please keep on posting,shine on xx

  3. Going through so many similar things in my head myself at the moment.

    I want to hide, yet then feel guilty because I have ended up acquiring so much experience and knowledge and there is bound to be someone in need of it somewhere. I guess not having firm plans about it and just taking each day at a time is the best we can do.

    Minimal social contact I can understand, as much as we are good with people we need to recharge. I think your blog is like counseling/coaching, in a way, and you get to control how much you interact.

    Great post, speaks to my heart.

  4. I feel the same! I actually tried many times to be a people person but it just doesn’t work for me! I just feel better being alone. Yes once in a while I enjoy some company but that’s it!

    Love your blog!!