In my childhood, no-one modelled anger and disgust about what abusers did to me.
I have come to realise, my inner child needs this now.
People who model compassion for abusers, minimize what they did, make excuses for them etc…create great fear in my inner child.
I have realised, people who choose to model compassion for abusers, rather than model her needs of seeing disgust and anger at the… harm they caused her…..won’t be trusted by her.
She closes down around people, who insist on showing positive emotions for abusive people, because that is what was done in childhood, when she was being abused.
This is a big issue in my counselling, because it is Christian based, and the Christian agenda of showing love for all, scares my inner child and I have realised this is why my inner child does not trust my counsellor.
Just some thoughts I have been having about my inner child over the last few days.
In my childhood no-one showed any form of anger or disgust about what abusive people were doing to me.
I have realised, when people model compassion and positive emotions about abusive people, that very severely hurt part of me (I call my inner child) – gets very scared and will shut down and not trust them.
I have realised this is a much needed missing part within my counselling, and I need to see this modelled. This isn’t modelled and the opposite occurs, and is continuing to cause big trust issues within my counselling relationship.
It is a ‘normal human need’ – for someone abused so badly – to have people validate the pain, by showing anger and disgust at what was done and about the people who caused it.
Just some of my thoughts today, Lilly ❤