I am now drinking alcohol every night. not enough to get drunk….just enough to get through the evening and to help me sleep. I am thinking about wanting a drink by lunchtime and desperate for it by 6pm’ish. It’s not good I know. I probably should not be drinking at all with the medication I take.
I know when overwhelmed, when I feel alone and feel I have no emotional support…I can end up using and craving my old coping habits.
My husband doesn’t seem to think it’s an issue, so says nothing and that helps me to continue drinking, as I haven’t got anyone encouraging me not to. But, I am a 43 year old woman, I shouldn’t need anyone to help me, or tell me what I am doing isn’t okay.
But, on a positive note, I did get out the house today, I went to the cheap shops and bought a few more cutesy things for my fairy garden and enjoyed that.
I realise my life is about acknowledging/accepting the bad and seeing/appreciating the good.