As people with deep self insight realise….even great minds like Carl Jung…..we all have an inner child, who has needs, particularly if unmet due to an unhealthy, abusive or neglectful childhood and no childhood is perfect.
I am a combination of…a very hurt inner child, a hurt inner teenager, adolescent, responsible/caring mother/wife, and my wise old soul part of me.
A post to my inner child healing page…
My inner child, does not trust my counsellor/doctor. The adult me, knows that my counsellor has a lot of wisdom I have and can learn from and I need that.
But, my inner child doesn’t feel safe, because my counsellor feels it necessary to show compassion to abusive people and uses positive words about them and doesn’t show any negative emotions about what my abusers have done to me…..and quite frankly that terrifies my inner child.
I know why….because that is what happened in my childhood…. abuse was minimized, abusers were deemed as good people and no-one validated my pain, fears or emotions as a child, and so those unmet needs…..continue on.
I’ve told my counsellor all this in writing, and that unless my inner child can trust her, there is no way I can divulge and talk about the worst stuff and all the many ways that has affected me. (I have endured considerable abuse from birth of every kind, from multiple abusers).
So, my inner child is speaking and I’m not sure if she is being heard.
And she/I am very nervous and currently waiting for an email back…and so my inner child’s emotions are anxious.
I can rationalise in a mature adult way, that my counsellor does not need to email me back the same day as she often does, and no doubt is busy, I am not her only client and no doubt has other more important things to do….especially now it is the weekend and that is totally okay……But, I know my inner child – who is very needy, very impatient, feels rejection, fear and a sense of being punished…easily…is desperate for a reply.
I am thankful that I am able to work out what is happening and why I can have opposing sets of needs occurring within me at the same time – and understand them.