A post to my page…
If you tell someone enough times they are bad, or they deserve to be hurt, they will end up believing it. Even if they act like they don’t, deep inside they have that shame and hurt.
This happened to me, and throughout the first 20 years of my life, I received continual messages, verbally and through actions and considerable emotional neglect….. that I needed and deserved to be hurt. This continued on into my adult life.
And this is why I have emotional self harming behaviours and why I have gravitated towards people who will hurt me. This being a subconscious action, not something I consciously sat and thought about.
To understand and acknowledge this, was very confronting, painful and emotional, and still is, although I am dealing with it better over time.
But, it was also a vital part of my healing journey.
I do encourage survivors seek trauma focussed counselling, to address these deeper issues, as we need support when dealing with them. I need counselling and fully admit I could not handle this, without my counselling support.