Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.

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So many people express how much my work/calling/passion ~ helps them & I am truly thankful.

I receive positive feedback all the time, every day … and I am thankful and I have been learning how to accept it graciously and not just dismiss it, because I used to have low self esteem.

“You absolutely nail how it is here;

reading your post was like having

someone read my mind.

Your page is beyond helpful;

it’s life-affirming, validating

first aid for the soul.”

I am thankful when anything I write and share ~ helps anyone.

Forgive & forget with no repentance….. every narcissistic & narcissistic church persons…demand…


This is one reason so many church people screw up so badly when it comes to forgiveness.

They think they can demand forgiveness, with no repentance and throw a bucket of cheap grace at it.

All of this……..is of Satan.

Absolutely nothing to do with Jesus, God, the Bible, or faith.

And one of so many reasons……..why churches attract abusers.


A relationship…. cannot be a one way street, or with someone emotionally stunted.


I have had self harming, trauma re-enacting behaviours….all my adult life…due to severe abuse as a child. It was really hard for me to see this and accept this…but I have.

I have chosen to be with people who are emotionally stunted, selfish, will use me, abuse me and have no care about me.

My ex -husband was an alcoholic, gambling addict, compulsive liar, thief ( he got sacked from a secure council job, due to thieving), abusive, manipulative, would pile on the guilt trip etc.

He was completely in a relationship only with himself and his unhealthy needs and dysfunction.

I am currently in a marriage, with a man who is only in a relationship with himself. No awareness of anything outside of his own shallow needs. Egocentric, compulsive liar, manipulative, covert behaviours, joy stealer, miserable, sarcastic, thinks he’s perfect etc.

Again, completely in a relationship only with himself and his unhealthy needs and dysfunction.

Both of these men….it is like been married to a teenager…….and essentially – psychologically, mentally, EQ wise, emotional maturity level …….this is exactly where these men are at.

Teenagers, are very egocentric, can be grumpy, moody and think the world revolves around them and their immature needs. Which is okay as a teenager……because that is their age and development.

But, many people never mature past this stage….and remain like teenagers and never grow through the maturity stages.

Which I do have compassion about…….because they are also very unhappy.

But, I also bear in mind….this is their choice – along with the behaviours they annoy, hurt, irritate others with and the lying, deviousness, manipulation, projecting, covert passive aggressiveness.

And one thing or sure…..you cannot have an adult, wise, mature relationship….. with that.


I became my own healing warrior… A post to my page.

A huge part of my healing journey……was not needing to rely on anyone else (in terms of people) to help me, care about me, or want the best for me.

I became my own warrior for my healing.

I had no choice.

But, it was actually a deep need, I am thankful I now realise.

In the absence of anyone around me who cares about my past, my pain, my healing (except counselling which is different) …. I learned the only person I needed to rely on…. is myself.

To rely on anyone else, to depend on anyone else….. leads to disappointment and being let down.

I am more secure, confident and healthy…. than I have ever been.

I am sharing this, for anyone who this may resonate with…

Or for anyone who is focussing on other people to heal them… to create their joy, peace, healing…. because I know that cannot be found outside of our own selves, our own soul.

~ Lilly Hope Lucario ❤