In situations that are difficult and hurt has been caused, I am aware it is always best to try and talk things through (with non abusive people) and explain myself & my thoughts, even if I do struggle to do that. Rather than just cut someone out of my life as a protection mode, I always jump to.
I don’t have to believe that everything a counsellor says, or trust is always right, or always wise. No-one has it all right, no-one is 100% wise, and I realise that. Including me.
So, I voiced my concerns, the hurt, where I believe it is wrong to label abusive relationships in any positive or neutral way, or use words that will usually be taken as positive. I will not accept that any abusive, unhealthy relationship, is ‘adequate’. Because that implies that abuse, is okay. And I get that society and particularly church people, believe some abuse is good/okay/tolerable. Well, I completely disagree.
And I am allowed to disagree.
Even if someone is tolerating abuse, for whatever reason, it is still not adequate, it is still an unhealthy abusive relationship. And I will not sugar coat that with more positive/neutral expressions. I realise people do sugar coat things to make life easier, to make it easier to deal with abusive people. I won’t.