Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.

Silence, is an answer. As is ignoring, witholding contact/responses.


I think I can now reasonably assume that as my counsellor has not responded to 3 emails this week, when normally she does respond, including one email saying I need to take a break and why….. means I can assume she is in agreement this is necessary. I’m not emailing her anymore.

And maybe this is God’s way of pointing me in a needed direction now.

Silence is an answer, as is ignoring and withholding contact, responses. I know enough about those behaviours and what they mean. They are passive aggressive behaviours, meant to punish, or withhold confrontation and deal with issues and will often be justified with a range of excuses.

Time to face one of my fears, and an emotive situation I have not wanted to face. I will struggle with this, but I don’t intend blogging about it anymore.

I know I will grieve, I will have painful emotions and I will allow myself that. I know all the psychological reasons why, but I also know I will survive it.

Just shows, you can’t ever put your trust in anyone.

Author: Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

I am a survivor of complex and multiple trauma and abuse, who at the age of 40, began my healing journey. I am using my journey to recovery and healing, to help others, to help survivors feel less alone, validated, encouraged and to enable others to understand themselves more. Complex trauma, particularly from severe, prolonged childhood abuse, is profoundly life changing. Complex trauma produces complex adults. The journey to recovery is a painful, often lonely, emotional daily challenge and it is my aim to encourage others in their daily battle. ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

5 thoughts on “Silence, is an answer. As is ignoring, witholding contact/responses.

  1. Oh i just read this. Maybe she hasn’t replied because she’s busy . But i think maybe it is time to find another. Maybe somebody that isn’t religion based would help because alot of religious People do have these traits that you mention. It will be painful. I will be thinking of you during the next few weeks going through this. And if you do need to vent you can pm. But i get that you probably won’t lol. Due to our wonderful trust issues.
    I Totaly Just lost 3 months of my life due to feeling abandoned when my t and my husband went away in January. Frantically doing all this crazy shit to push them away so I’m not abandoned. Because i do the abandoning. My littles are worried that she doesn’t like us. I’m worried that im too crazy for her. And then some parts hate her. It’s hard.

    • I’m so sorry things are so hard for you and I wish there was some way to make it easier. Dealing with these intense emotions of fear and abandonment, is so hard.

      My doctor/counsellor checks her email daily, she has to for her work and I know she is ignoring me, as I cancelled my appointment today, explained in a final email why I am struggling with the way she speaks to me etc, and still no response. So it really is the silent/avoidance treatment.

      Which is pretty devastating.

      That’s life, I am aware I can’t trust anyone. And I am thankful you do understand these trust issues we have.

      ❤ ❤

      • Hmmm Yeah my t does that to. Then brings up the email in session. I just thought it was how she does it. But yet sometimes she does reply. I’ve canceled mine before because i feel like she’s not helping or shes ignoring the important things. I’m sorry things aren’t good for you to. It really sux. It sux not being able to be trusted though to. 😦 by you. But i get it. 😦

  2. Really, really unprofessional of her. I’m so sorry you are going through this. I know how painful silent treatment can be. 😦 A lot of times it is downplayed and not given the full weight of how destructive it is but it can cause so much shame. You don’t deserve that. ❤

    • Yes, being ignored, avoided and the silent treatment, is very harmful and when it comes from someone you trusted and wanted to believe had your interests at heart and was your only support physically in your life, it is so much worse.

      Thank you for all your support Marissa, I truly appreciate it.