Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.

I accept I will never be ‘good enough’ for many.


not good enough

I accept that my life has created considerable suffering, pain, and all the emotions that go with that. I accept I will be dealing with complex trauma and all the profound consequences, all my life. I accept I don’t have what is needed to heal all the severe childhood complex trauma – as I don’t have healing, safe, trustworthy, caring relationships. I accept I suffer the many consequences of severe childhood complex trauma; depression, deep grieving, life impacting fear.

I also accept as a result of this, I will never be ‘good enough’ for many. By their standards, for their needs.

I am not positive ‘enough’.

I am not healed ‘enough’.

I am not hopeful ‘enough’.

I am not most people’s version of a ‘strong warrior survivor’ – I don’t meet this criterion ‘enough’.

I don’t talk about life as all good, all amazing, all wonderful ‘enough’.

I am not what other people demand and expect ‘enough’.

I don’t fake it ‘enough’.

I don’t pretend things are better than they are ‘enough’.

I don’t barf up happiness ‘enough’.

I don’t follow along with this delusion that abuse ‘is not that bad’ ‘enough’.

I could go on, but even the list, would not be ‘good enough’.

The reality is, all that is what ‘other people’ demand, for their lives. And is nothing to do with me.

The question is, how do I deal with this?

By staying away from people who will always tell me I am not ‘good enough’.

~ Lilly Hope Lucario

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Author: Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

I am a survivor of complex and multiple trauma and abuse, who at the age of 40, began my healing journey. I am using my journey to recovery and healing, to help others, to help survivors feel less alone, validated, encouraged and to enable others to understand themselves more. Complex trauma, particularly from severe, prolonged childhood abuse, is profoundly life changing. Complex trauma produces complex adults. The journey to recovery is a painful, often lonely, emotional daily challenge and it is my aim to encourage others in their daily battle. ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

9 thoughts on “I accept I will never be ‘good enough’ for many.

  1. Dear Lilly,
    Stay strong in your faith. Yes it is a long journey but look at the gold in each day no matter how small (sometimes you will need a microscope). We are all imperfect and scarred but that is where your courage comes from because you want others to understand their own pain and psychological injuries. Continue your journey. Helping others by sharing your knowledge is priceless. I will continue to pray for you. Julie

    • Thank you Julie, I appreciate your words and your prayers ❤

      • Thanks Lilly
        Although I do not know you personally being sisters in Christ is enough to know that we can pray for each other. Sometimes victims of abuse become critical, judgemental and so enraged that they end up shaming and hurting others. I guess that is why you stopped social media. You can’t change or control what people say or do but protecting yourself with good boundaries and surrounding yourself with people who are not toxic are the best things you can do. Good for you Lilly. Social media can be highly toxic. You have so much to offer please don’t stop your mission to educate yourself and others about cptsd. It needs to be in the next manual separate from classic ptsd. Courageous people such as you create pathways. Please know that you are not alone. God bless Julie

  2. You are so good enough. It is those people with the problem, not you. X

    • It’s one of many reasons I have quit social media, because I have been repeatedly told my journey, how I am dealing with it, is not ‘good enough’….. not what others want/demand to see. And it’s bad enough to be shamed by non abuse survivors ….. even harder to be shamed by other survivors.

      I think it has given me an appreciation of not telling anyone else – their journey is not okay. Each of our journey’s are where we are at and patience and understanding of that, is needed.

      Anyone who doesn’t ‘get that’, needs to be out of our lives. We don’t need to be shamed and criticised.

  3. You are definitely ‘real’ enough! ~ and that’s enough for people like us who need more ‘me too!’ moments. Thank you for keeping it real.

  4. Maybe the question should be—– what have those people done to EARN a place in Your Life.

  5. I am at the point now, of not being concerned whether I am good enough for people. I know I am good enough and that is all that truly matters.

    My capacity to leave the issues other people have, with them, and not personalise them, has increased considerably.


  6. You are such a talented writer…most times, I read your post two or three times. Your talent amazes me. So gifted. If I had half the talent you have, I would be on Broadway ! Such a blessing to many people.