It’s become pretty clear to me that 99% of opinions, are simply that… opinions.
And…… What doesn’t often accompany those opinions, are wisdom, or insight. Or unselfish motivations. And when about abuse and abusers, often contain a range of cognitive distortions that enable people to cope with their life, they way they find easiest. I also know these opinions are mostly nothing to do with me, my needs.
I shared my thoughts on this today with my counsellor, including her within this. How she chooses to view abuse and abusers, is how ‘she’ needs to cope and do her job and how she wants to view herself. And is nothing to do with me.
I won’t tolerate people telling me how to feel and think any longer. I accept where people are at, but that does not give them the right to tell me I need to think the same. Especially when I know they are choosing cognitive distortions to help them cope. I get it, I’ve been there. I lived in denial, minimization, justifying, shifting blame to myself, rationalising. It was how I used to cope. Continue reading