Doing well with clearer and healthier boundaries on social media.

When deciding to go back to being an admin of my Facebook community page, I knew I needed more self care, more boundaries and that I do not need to explain or justify that to anyone.

The internet is not a safe place and far too many people use social media as a way of venting their issues, and I am not there to be someone they can vent on.

So my new boundaries are…

– Any overt or covert trolling, is not tolerated.

– Any unnecessary complaining and criticism, are not tolerated.

– Any abusive remarks, including the passive aggressive and covert forms of behaviours, are not tolerated.

– Any minimizing of child abuse and complex trauma, are not tolerated.

– Any controlling and manipulative behaviours, are not tolerated.

– Any abusive, provoking behaviours, are not tolerated.

– Any projecting about issues that shame people, like forgiveness, are not tolerated.

Volunteering went well – but exhausted again.

So much I could write about today, but I have virtually no energy to write.

I realise there are many reasons why volunteering is emotionally and physically draining, but I am glad I did it.

I think the anxiety, the hypervigilance of being in a new environment and around new people….. plus all these people who came in today for the food and told me some of their stories, plus a few volunteers were in tears about

Being the abused child of a narcissistic parent……. profoundly affects the adult survivor.

Interesting article https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/insight-is-2020/201405/narcissistic-parents-psychological-effect-their-children

Always good to see professionals and experts confirming and validating just how damaging these personality disordered caregivers are and validating the profound effect their abuse has on their children and the adults they become.

From the article…

Because the narcissistic parent-child bond was so distorted and corrupt, the offspring as adults tend to gravitate toward drama-laden, roller-coaster relationships – especially with romantic partners.

Because they didn’t grow up with the belief that they were intrinsically okay and good, it makes perfect sense that these individuals would gravitate toward stormy romantic partners later.

These adults would feel like a fish out of water in a relationship with someone who loved them consistently, and the experience would be so unfamiliar that it would cause major anxiety.