Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.


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“You are stronger than you think you are”…. But really……. am I?

This week at counselling, it was all about emotions. And fear. The intensity of emotions, the right to have them and feel them, and my incapacity to deal with them. And all the fear reasons and how intense that fear is.

I tried to explain I know the depth of my increasing understanding of what has happened to me in the first 20 years of my life, outweighs my capacity to deal with intensity of the emotions I feel about it all.

My counsellor said she feels I am stronger than I think I am and she believes I can deal with intensity of the emotions, if I get to a safe enough place to allow them to be felt.

I wonder if she really believes that, or feels obliged to say it? Because to agree with me that I don’t have the capacity to deal with all, is not ‘what counsellors say’. Counsellors are meant to encourage you and tell you – you will make it, you are strong enough. Continue reading


As so much on social media is BS, I am continually limiting what I see/read.

I see crap on social media all the time, about mental health and PTSD, Complex PTSD. And mental health and potentially life threatening disorders, are not something to be taken lightly.

I am aware of how much BS is out there and this is not my problem. The easiest way to deal with it, is to stay away from it all. So many pages have been un-liked and I limit the amount of time I look at my newsfeed.

It is been confirmed, this is healthy, wise and good boundaries. Continue reading


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Wasn’t able to join the Tweet Campaign for #BreakThe Stigma…… but this was so amazing!

I had been invited to join NorthWestern University in their twitter campaign, which was great. But, with the time zone difference, it meant I could not participate, as I was already committed to my volunteering work.

I already do enough on social media, more than enough.

So, choosing where I focus my work, is needed. I am not an organisation with different members, or a charity etc…. like many who were invited, I am one person, still healing. And I need to remember that, and have balance and only do what I am needing to do.

Interestingly, we discussed this at counselling. How I need to not feel like I should be doing more for others, than I am actually responsible for, or anything that affects my own healing needs. And I am getting better at this.

So, I chose to post a pic – as the University were inviting people to do on their Facebook page, about how people are helping to break the stigma, and I was so blown away by all the responses and support. And it reiterates how what I do, is enough, matters, and is all I need to be doing.

Update, the post was removed by that page. So rude and unnecessary, especially after I promoted them at their request.