Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.


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This is a perfect example of why I now avoid most social media pages ….especially those not supported by professionals.

(If anything has cemented my understanding of how unhealthy social media is, this is it. Just because someone has a lot of followers – it absolutely does not mean they are wise, or healthy, at all. And how I am right to strictly limit what I read on social media, who I connect with and reduce my time on social media.)

I am not – at all – a fan of paedophiles, or sex offenders, or people similar. In fact, I think they are evil and need locking up for their entire natural life. I don’t like them, or make excuses for them, or enable them in any way. I have pretty strong views on them, how I know what they do is a choice and how disgusting that is and how society and children in particular, need protecting from them.

But, when uneducated, unwise people take it too far and suggest people are paedophiles, with no basis for that – other than a few people who may have been……. and then label a whole group of people – such as transgender – as potentially paedophiles – that is so bizarre, so dangerous and so not okay.

Despite having been abused by paedophiles, I would never suggest someone is one, unless I had proof. And I would never suggest a whole group of people may be paedophiles.

This page (Dreamcatchers for Abused Children

https://www.facebook.com/DreamcatcherforAbusedChildren?fref=nf )

that I ‘previously’ supported – and are a registered charity in US….have published this article suggesting transgender people are rooted in paedophilia.

How incredibly disgusting is that! Continue reading


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I guess I have more hope within me, than I believe I do.

I am exhausted. All the time. Many valid reasons.

Including the depth of pain I go through in peeling away the layers of trauma and what they mean. The deep grieving. The emotional pain. The physical pain. The daily grind of dealing with Complex PTSD, PTSD and associated illness. The daily issues I have to deal with. The lack of support in my life.

I am aware, a lot of the time, the only reason I think I keep going is my children.

I often want to give up. Yet, I never do. And I never have, despite everything endured.

I realise I am still working on stuff. Still implementing better boundaries and self care… which is a huge part of this journey.

I just realised as I am typing, I don’t want to use the words ‘healing’ and ‘recovery’ anymore. They make it worse. They shame me. They shame others too, in a covert way. I see that clearly. They focus on an end goal I am ‘expected to reach’ that I may never reach, or may take a lifetime to reach. I refuse to do that to myself anymore. And even that, is progress. I will call it ‘my journey’ and nothing more. Continue reading


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Better self care implemented. Unliking every page dealing with narcissism/psychopathy (etc), except 3.

I have come to realise just how many disordered and dysfunctional people are admins of pages about narcissistic (etc) abuse. I am not the only page admin who has noted this. Two others I do support, have also stated the same.

I have made the decision, to unlike every page except for 3 I trust… who have proven themselves to be trustworthy and having good motivations, over a long period of time…

After Narcissistic Abuse, There is Light, Life & Love

Psychopath Free

Self Care Haven/The Smart Girl’s Guide to Self Care

These three are featured on my Website. And I note, they all have great self care and boundaries – as healthy people do. They focus on their own work, and do not associate much with other pages etc, at all. I am, however, blessed – they do all support my work too. As do many mental health professionals. I am blessed with quality support.

I also stick to professionals in the field, experts in personality disorders, as their work is respected, educated, insightful and valuable.

I refuse to get sucked in to any further unhealthy BS on social media, and I refuse to feel responsible for people who are being lied to, groomed and duped by unhealthy people. They are not my responsibility. They are their own. My issues of ‘over responsibility’ for others, is something I was burdened with as a child, by my abusive mother.

And I accept only ‘I’ can change this and change this, I must. 

I have been sucked into unhealthy, disordered people’s lives, lies and BS all my life and the only way to stop this, is to stop participating in it. Continue reading