Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.

Quit counselling.


Lots of reasons…. I shouldn’t have to ask my counsellor to validate that all the child abuse wasn’t my fault, blame, shame. That was her job to offer that support. I shouldn’t have to be subjected to continual shaming, because her views about abusers are different to mine.

I shouldn’t be made to feel worse about myself, as a result of all this.

A counsellors job is to provide safety for a complex trauma survivor to deal with ‘their’ journey. Not project opinions that hurt and shame.

I’ve already been through enough.

Author: Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

I am a survivor of complex and multiple trauma and abuse, who at the age of 40, began my healing journey. I am using my journey to recovery and healing, to help others, to help survivors feel less alone, validated, encouraged and to enable others to understand themselves more. Complex trauma, particularly from severe, prolonged childhood abuse, is profoundly life changing. Complex trauma produces complex adults. The journey to recovery is a painful, often lonely, emotional daily challenge and it is my aim to encourage others in their daily battle. ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

8 thoughts on “Quit counselling.

  1. Problem is I think, when patients seek therapy, they do Not know the difference between a good therapist or bad therapist. Only by educating themselves on the SYMPTOMS of abuse will they ever have a clue ! My therapist at least gave me homework…..reading about various types of abuse…I have been reading for three years—hours a day. Finally, recognizing my symptoms ….flight, fright, freez, fawn, dissociation. I am no longer a basket case. Now I am a volcano dealing w/ my anger. Every day is a new roller coaster ride.

  2. Attachment theory, my therapist told me to study. Thought he was a little off. After reading. I realized I have been Off for years. Attachment to what? to nothing.

  3. Yes you have. It’s wrong. My counselor is the same and i don’t know if this is how they are trained or what. It’s shit and it makes you feel like shit. Sorry you going through this. That’s why I’m scared to quit because i know it’ll hurt too. X

  4. You know what is best for you and what feels right! You gave it another go and it didn’t make you feel safe. I am hoping there will be another gentle, kind & safe counselor out there to support you on your journey. ❤

  5. What a shame that you can’t find a safe space in your counselling 😦 you are absolutely right that good counselling should never be about the therapist’s agenda or opinions, and should offer empathy & no judgment. I am sorry that you haven’t been able to find that x

  6. Thank you everyone ❤

    Yes, I believe therapy should be purely for the interests of the client, with no agenda's and no judgment/shaming.

    I have been judged for my need to work out abusers, what they are, what they did, label their traits, refuse to feel sorry for them etc.

    I've been made to feel inferior, and not good enough for not having the same views as my counsellor.

    I've been made to feel I am 'wrong/bad' for feeling the way I do.

    I've been offered no validation for what I went through and how it was not my fault, blame, shame, unless I ask for it. Which is bizarre, as it is obvious it is what I need the most.

    I realise when people have personal agenda's, the other person's needs don't get considered/met.

    I refuse to be subjected to other people's opinions/agenda's and made to feel wrong for not having the same opinions.

    I've had enough of that controlling behaviour already in my life.

  7. The psychopath author on SociopathWorld on wordpress describes how she is a therapist and purposely tries to make people kill themselves. Perhaps you can get your counselor investigated.