Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.

‘Don’t judge others’ ‘forgive’ – often simply a way for many to avoid the realities of terrible actions/behaviours of others.


Most of humanity prefers to not have to deal with the realities of life. Realities like child abuse, abuse, how many psychopathic, sociopathic, narcissistic people, paedophiles, sex offenders etc etc etc  are in the world. And how intentionally they cause harm, and how they have no remorse, no conscience, no empathy.

Many religious people use the term ‘don’t judge others’ as the perfect excuse to avoid reality and avoid dealing with people who choose to harm others.

Easier to find some excuse to rationalise their behaviour. Easier to find some excuse as a cop out.. Easier, lazier, takes a lot less thought and a lot less living in reality.

It’s also why forgiveness is pushed so much by religious people such as ‘Christians’ and Buddhists etc.

Takes less effort and less action, to just say ‘don’t judge’ and ‘forgive’…….. than actually dealing with it all appropriately. I see how self serving it often truly is.

And in many cases, this belief some people have of demanding ‘don’t judge’ and ‘forgive’ – is purely self serving, as it makes people feel ‘better’ than others. It boosts their ego. They feel ‘good’ about themselves to think this way, and then project that onto others to put others down and make them feel bad. All abusive in itself.

Humanity is selfish to it’s core and I see this clearly in these behaviours.

Not many have the wisdom and clarity of vision to see the realities of life, and act unselfishly and without self serving intentions.

Author: Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

I am a survivor of complex and multiple trauma and abuse, who at the age of 40, began my healing journey. I am using my journey to recovery and healing, to help others, to help survivors feel less alone, validated, encouraged and to enable others to understand themselves more. Complex trauma, particularly from severe, prolonged childhood abuse, is profoundly life changing. Complex trauma produces complex adults. The journey to recovery is a painful, often lonely, emotional daily challenge and it is my aim to encourage others in their daily battle. ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

5 thoughts on “‘Don’t judge others’ ‘forgive’ – often simply a way for many to avoid the realities of terrible actions/behaviours of others.

  1. I have nominated you for the Once a Victim, Now a Survivor Award. If you choose to accept you can copy and paste the badge from my post. To see details please see my post here http://relationshipedia.me/about/once-a-victim-…survivor-award/
    xx~ Bree

  2. A Classic reply from people is “LET IT GO'” THAT’S A HOT ONE!!! As I am learning about the affects of abuse, I realize how Uneducated these people are .

    • ‘Let it go’ is highly uneducated in trauma, and again is self serving. It’s what the person saying it wants for themselves. It’s not about the person they are saying it to. It is very judgmental and very damaging.

      I ignore and avoid people who are selfish & self serving.

  3. The “Let it go” mantra makes me want to circle-slap folk. Unfortunately, those who are so quick to demand folks “forgive” concurrently have no issue harming other and NEVER forgiving.

    In addition, this “forgive and forget” dogma, I believe is a means to quiet the cognitive dissonance caused by the intersection of PTSD/C-PTSD in our culture and the “Just world” beleifs…

    There are people who have no empathy.
    There are people who abuse, malign and seek to destroy others.
    There are preditors among us.
    ….and they deserve NO FORGIVENESS.