Child sexual abuse and complex trauma (prolonged/repeated severe trauma/abuse) are both specialised fields where only those experienced, educated and insightful enough, should be treating/counselling anyone. Or writing about it.
I have come to realise how many counsellors/therapists/psychologists etc are no where near trauma/complex trauma informed/educated enough to treat appropriately. Many work well outside of their capability to treat/counsel. They generalise trauma, minimize severe trauma/suffering and re-traumatise survivors all the time and they lack empathy/insight to care/understand. And they shame survivors as a result.
This is really re-traumatising to survivors, many of whom have had the severe abuse minimized when it was occurring, or when they told someone about it.
Severe child abuse survivors, often have their trauma minimized. Many people do not want, or lack empathy to deal with the truth about severe child abuse and severe child sexual abuse.
It is hurtful, upsetting, re-traumatising, triggering and downright dangerous when people minimize severe abuse.
It can push people over the edge and if suicidal, it can cause suicide.
People who lack empathy and lack understanding of severe, prolonged, complex trauma – need to keep quiet. They cause more harm, than good.
This blog post has been really well received on Twitter, including by some professionals.
It was re-posted by University Of Liverpool Hearing Voices Study, two trainee clinical psychologists completing research and studies @ http://www.hearingvoicesresearch.org.uk/
March 28, 2016 at 8:55 am
a long time ago, I went to my first therapist and when I told him at age 9 my sisters husband fondled me numerous times.—his reply——–why cant you just tell yourself he was just ” tickling ” you? If your sister finds out it will change the relationship between the two of you !!! I was actually sobbing when I told him and he just Minimized the story!!!
March 28, 2016 at 9:09 am
That is such harmful advice from a therapist. I’m so sorry you were invalidated and your pain of sexual abuse minimized in this way.
Sadly, I see a lot of invalidation, minimization, rationalisation about child abuse and sexual abuse.
It is very wrong, very harmful.
❤ ❤
March 28, 2016 at 9:22 am
Lily You have helped me so much !!!!!
March 28, 2016 at 9:24 am
I am thankful to help you Charlie ❤
March 28, 2016 at 1:33 pm
I read this post and felt I had to reply.
I saw my first therapist when I was 14 and went through therapists like Kleenex (averaging one per year) up until my 32nd birthday before I found one that had an inkling of what I was going through. Every time I brought up issues of parental abuse, I was told it was all in my head and was treated with CBT and the like. Even worse, I was constantly being fed false hope by being told that things would “get better” on their own.
The general public needs to made aware that mental and emotional suffering is just as bad, if not worse, that any physical malady one can endure. Complex PTSD is, in my mind, just as bad as diabetes or even cancer. Others might have an idea of the pain we endure, but only we know the carnage of the inner landscape that exists within us. And because the suffering isn’t clearly visible, people don’t assume that it counts.
The public should not only be educated on the basics of Complex PTSD, but the mental health system should also be overhauled so that it is more affordable as well. And therapists like those who told me it was “all in my head” need to have their licenses revoked and be dragged out into the street and shot. It would have saved me 18 years of pain and thousands of dollars to boot.
March 28, 2016 at 1:42 pm
I agree Ben, and it is known within the mental health industry, that Complex PTSD is the mental health equivalent of cancer.
I am passionate about educating society with my Website and the blog, plus via social media.
Many mental health professionals, have confirmed they follow my work, to better educate themselves about complex trauma, to better treat their own clients.
Sadly, many in the mental field, are not educated enough about complex trauma and treat outside of their experience/education/insight/empathy level. Which causes a lot of damage.
I will keep educating, validating and sharing the insight I have.
Lilly ❤ ❤