I know I am going to have to find another counsellor. Only one who specialises in child sexual abuse trauma and exploitation. One who doesn’t shame me.
I’m not coping with the exploitation stuff. I’m not coping with the shame of all the grooming. I’m not coping with trying to do this on my own.
I would rather die, than have to feel any more of this pain.
Again, I’m at that place where it’s only my children keeping me alive.
I’m going to have to find a counsellor, and pay whatever it costs. Because the cost of me not finding suitable counselling and not getting the help I need, could end up being way higher.