Mental illness, does not negate personal responsibility for abusive actions.

Today in counselling, I brought up this bizarre belief many in society, including many within the mental health profession have…. of justifying/rationalising abusive behaviours… and ‘blaming’ mental illness. I see it all the time … “she/he can’t help it, she/he is mentally ill”. So unwise. Actually in most cases, yes they can help it. They made choices.

And the response was, an agreement that indeed not all mental illness means people are not responsible and conscious of their actions.

There are some mental illness, like psychosis, that does mean people are not consciously aware of their behaviours. But this a very small % of people.

To say narcissistic, sociopathic people, paedophiles, predators, con artists etc…. are ‘just mentally ill’ and ‘can’t help what do’ – is absolutely wrong. That’s not compassion/empathy. That is cognitive distortion – rationalising, denial, minimizing, justifying etc. That’s not dealing in truth.

Within most mental illness, people still know their abusive actions are wrong and they do it anyway. They are fully responsible for their actions.

Having a mental health diagnosis does not negate personal responsibility for actions. It is still choices people make. And people need to be made responsible for their actions.

The lack of empathy/support for children with PTSD, from adults with PTSD, is blatant amongst advocates.

I have noticed a continuing pattern of adults with PTSD, being very supportive of other adults with PTSD, but when it comes to posts about children with PTSD, failing to be anywhere near as supportive.

In fact, I have noticed an overwhelming failure by society at large to care about children, in many ways. Perfect example….. it’s okay to hit your children and call it ‘discipline’, but hit an adult family member and that’s domestic violence. Bizarre thinking. Totally hypocritical.

Adults are far more willing to care about how adults feel…. and often far less concerned about how children feel.

When it comes to trauma and abuse, many within the PTSD advocacy field, care a lot less about children who have suffered trauma and have PTSD, than adults.

Which is so wrong, because children suffer more due to their lack of coping skills, immature brain development and when their caregivers are involved/complicit or neglectful, the trauma is far worse. It doesn’t take much empathy to realise feeling such deep fear, and enduring such trauma to cause PTSD, as a child, is worse.

I went to counselling, stood up for myself & expressed what I know, see & feel.

I was unsure whether to attend counselling any further. As I have written in previous blogs. But, I went, expressed what I think, feel and know, particularly with regards to shame. It was all validated as correct, appropriate and an apology offered.

I am still processing the whole conversation, which often takes me days, as I think and digest it fully.

I am glad to have been validated about ‘shame shifting’ and how wrong it is, and the shame of abuse is entirely the abusers. And victims of abuse should not be shamed further.

I am glad it was validated – not only as okay to learn about personality disorders, psychopaths, paedophiles, pathological/disordered behaviours etc……… but told of the courage it requires to take this path.