Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.

Perfect example of an empty, unwise, distorted platitude.



Platitudes such as this one, are popular. They self soothe and appeal to those who don’t think deeply and don’t want to deal with truth and reality.

Darkness, is never a gift. To suggest it is, is rationalising it, which is disordered, unwise thinking. Putting some irrational positive meaning to why it occurred and why it is ‘good’. It isn’t good.

So many of these unwise quotes are so popular. I understand why, they self soothe, without the need to deal with painful truth.

But, I see the deeper, bigger picture and how they weaken society continually. And that makes me sad.

Author: Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

I am a survivor of complex and multiple trauma and abuse, who at the age of 40, began my healing journey. I am using my journey to recovery and healing, to help others, to help survivors feel less alone, validated, encouraged and to enable others to understand themselves more. Complex trauma, particularly from severe, prolonged childhood abuse, is profoundly life changing. Complex trauma produces complex adults. The journey to recovery is a painful, often lonely, emotional daily challenge and it is my aim to encourage others in their daily battle. ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

5 thoughts on “Perfect example of an empty, unwise, distorted platitude.

  1. I totally agree with this. There is an interesting view presented by Melody Beattie in her book, The New Codependency. She goes a little into this overly positive language, but the underlying idea is to encourage people to fully accept, and to surrender to the knowledge of, bad things happening, and to see them as part of a learning curve, in order to allow oneself to move on from them, and solely for the sufferer’s benefit. (She also talks about the need to keep grieving things in different ways, for balance.) I was reminded because she does sometimes use some overly positive terms like this saying, telling the reader to express ‘gratitude’ for bad things, and I wondered if the above has a similar useful sentiment.

  2. By *useful sentiment*, I mean the initial one about moving on, not the one about being grateful!

  3. Yes, expressing gratitude for bad things happening to self, or others, like child abuse, sexual abuse, is not wise or okay. That is suggesting these are good, needed etc and that is not true.

    I am not glad for the trauma and abuse I have endured. I am not thankful for it. I can accept my life, all that has occurred and learn from it, without the need to see it as ‘good’ or being thankful for it.

    Abuse is never okay, never needed, never good and never deserved. I refuse to see it in positive terms, as I see how harmful it is to suggest these.

    It’s putting a good spin on it, which is not wise.

  4. Hi. I agree with you but I can see it in another way too. I don’t see darkness as a gift when i’m in it, but the darkness has brought gifts to me such as being compassionate, being able to see through people, seeing the big picture, and becoming a deeper person. They may not make me “happy”, but the world doesn’t need a happy person to heal. It needs compassionate, wounded healers to recover from all the poison poured in it. I think these are gifts that no shallow and painless life could ever give to the world. The gift is you to the world!

    • I don’t believe any form of abuse or trauma is a gift. No-one deserves it, or needs it.
      What I do believe, is some survivors can develop empathy for other survivors and for people suffering.
      But, no abuse can ever be considered a gift. It isn’t.
      Abuse is wrong and never justifiable.