Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.

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Guru worship – the ‘celebrity worship’ of the self development crowd.

People in the new age, self development, self actualisation world, love to put people up on pedestals. Love to put guru’s up on pedestals. I don’t. People such as Chopra, Wayne Dyer etc, to me, are fallible, imperfect men and I question their thinking and I do not agree with some of it.

It is interesting, watching all these ‘intelligent’ people idolise these guru’s. They can do and say no wrong. That is not intelligent thinking at all. But, people are deluded into believing it is.

I don’t doubt Dyer had a heart to help people. I think he had a level of introspection. But, some of his thinking is very dubious/irrational and I question it and don’t agree with all he believed. And that is far more balanced, rational thinking, than just believing all he stated/wrote.

People seem to love guru worship, and celebrity worship. And I know this, because I have recognised and accepted I used to do this too. I see my own distorted thinking in the past and the reasons for it. I have the honesty and insight, to self reflect and be wrong. And change how I think. I have that capacity for humility. Continue reading

People self soothe, self serve, with ‘theories’ about abusers.

I see clearly how people irrationally think or believe something, to self soothe, as a coping strategy, as a self serving need.

Clear example…. the theories for paedophilia. There is no cure for it. There are only theories about it’s causes. I’ve done my research.

Most paedophiles, have not been sexually abused. So people will theorise, it is some kind of abuse/neglect. But, that is all it is ….. a theory. There is no proven known cause. Nothing in neuroscience has identified a cause. Fact.

Why do people choose to believe theories? Like with most of humanity who choose to believe theories – there are a variety of reasons. In this case, it helps cope with the vile, disgusting facts of paedophilia. It rationalises why they have these thoughts/needs. Some like to believe theories, because they feel it makes them more compassionate (self serving). Some need to excuse/rationalise it, as the reality is too ‘vile’ to deal with (self soothing). Or both. Continue reading

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Corporal punishment/discipline, grooms children to stay silent about abuse.


I read this story of this man, and as I read through the abuse he also suffered from his parents, I could see clearly how these religious communities groom children for child sexual abuse. And why child sexual abuse is as prevalent as it is, within religious communities.

When authoritarian parents, who demand obedience and force children to not be able to speak up for themselves, and children live in fear of being hit, spanked, belted etc… they become easy targets for predators. Because they are already being abused. And they are far more likely to keep quiet.

I’ve seen this kind of parenting at a right wing, non empathy Baptist Church. Corporal punishment and physical discipline  heavily encouraged, from being babies. Parents who do not ‘follow like sheep’ are frowned upon, and made to feel like they are the bad parents. Parenting courses are completed in secret and only the sheeple are allowed to participate. All Satan led.

Not only is this abusive parenting which causes lifelong issues, but it can cause further issues. Predators love these types of religious communities. Children living in fear, don’t speak up when being sexually abused. And if they do, they are further treated badly and further abused. The ‘church’ often cares more about it’s reputation, than the children/victims. Families within religious communities, often care more about their reputation within the church, than their own children. Continue reading

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I subconsciously pick up on all cues. Including what people don’t say, and conflicting cues.

This quote is very me. I realise I learned this young. I am aware I have these skills to a greater depth than the average person, and I learned it to survive the first 20 years of my life. I accept this skill level and I accept other people don’t understand it.

Most people don’t understand what they haven’t experienced, or skills they do not personally have. I therefore understand, people will doubt my capacity for discernment. I’ve been told to trust it. But, most people don’t pick up on behaviours, cues in people beyond a shallow level, and remain ignorant of them, don’t pick up on red flags. And ignorance, is bliss, for many. Continue reading