People who lack the courage for integrity to honesty, will often either deny own wrongdoing, or minimize them. It’s how they cope. It takes a really honest person to fully admit wrongdoing, especially when it’s hurt someone.
This happened today. Someone minimized something hurtful. Minimized ‘laughing at someone’ (to the point of needing tissues due to ‘crying with laughter’)…….down to ‘smiling’. Instead of just owning the full behaviour, owning the hurt caused to someone, minimized it to something far more minor. And that is always how I know someone knows they have done wrong. You don’t lie in this way, when you have done no wrong.
This is dishonesty, lack of courage and lack of empathy for the person hurt. And selfishness, because lying to someone in this way, is defending ones own ego, not about helping the other person.
When this is a pattern of behaviour, I know I’m dealing with someone dishonest and someone who cannot be trusted.
It’s sad how little integrity to honesty people can have……. and yet they deem themselves ‘wise. ‘Wiser’ than someone who is honest, who does have courage and integrity. I think not.
Wisdom, humility and maturity requires honesty. And is not about minimizing actions and hurt caused. Something most people fail at.
But, the good part is……… I know not to take this personally. It’s that person’s issues, not mine. And I know to not expect anything else from someone who has patterns of this type of behaviour.
I’ll just keep being me…… and leave people to be them and have needed boundaries.