Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.

My son’s first night at Church youth group. Anxiety.

I have anxiety. Inwardly, rather than outwardly. My stomach is letting me know I have anxiety, as I feel nauseous.

I do know it is absolutely okay that I have anxiety about my son attending a church youth group. Especially when we’ve only just started attending the church and I don’t know the people there yet.

It is also okay that I have anxiety, because church has not previously been a positive experience at all, for me, or my son and family. So, it is normal to feel concerned, worried and be anxious.

My rational mind is thinking it will be most likely be fine, he will most likely be safe and have a great time.

My anxious mind, that has a great deal of knowledge of widespread church issues and poor attitudes regarding potentially or known abusive people …… is reminding me just how badly churches can f*** it up, when it comes to keeping kids/teenagers safe.

I need a drink.


Update on this blog. Found out the youth group is finishing at the end of this term. So, decided to check out our local PCYC youth group – which has police officers running it (my husband is a police officer and has helped out with their discos). I will feel it is relatively safe to allow my son attend there. My son is happy about this too. He’ll hopefully start attending there next term.

As this church we are attending, have the younger children remaining within church auditorium and not taken to other parts of the church, I feel this is safer too.

So, I can concentrate on the church as a whole and not be worrying about child protection/child safety issues.

Author: Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

I am a survivor of complex and multiple trauma and abuse, who at the age of 40, began my healing journey. I am using my journey to recovery and healing, to help others, to help survivors feel less alone, validated, encouraged and to enable others to understand themselves more. Complex trauma, particularly from severe, prolonged childhood abuse, is profoundly life changing. Complex trauma produces complex adults. The journey to recovery is a painful, often lonely, emotional daily challenge and it is my aim to encourage others in their daily battle. ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

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