I invited a friend for Christmas Day, so he won’t be alone.

I have a friend, who has been treated really badly by his ex-wife. She is highly narcissistic and basically used him to emigrate and then dumped him. Long story, but even before she left him, I had already worked out the red flags of narcissism.

So, he is on his own, the other side of the world from his family and the great job he gave up to emigrate. But, he’s staying here, to be near his children.

He is a shy kind of person and doesn’t like to think he is imposing, but I’ve invited him to come and see us over Christmas, and invited him for Christmas Day. We have my in-laws staying with us, so one extra is no bother at all and my husband is

During the holiday season, my posts are encouraging needed self care.

Christmas and the holiday season, are really hard for many. I understand this fully. Whether it be due to PTSD symptoms increasing, like anxiety, hyper vigilance, depression etc, or due to grieving loss, or family issues increasing…. it’s a time for much needed self care.

I have my husbands parents staying with us for Christmas, and I needed to have a plan for how to cope. This plan includes having some time to myself, and my husband is sorting out all food and cooking. This means the increased anxiety, stress etc of having people staying in my home for 4 weeks, does not increase to a point where I cannot cope.

I’m also not feeling guilty for my self care plan, because most people without PTSD – find having family or anyone staying with them, challenging. So bearing that in mind, I have no guilt at taking care of myself, throughout this time. Which benefits everyone.

So, this shows my increased self care, and capacity to deal with potentially anxiety raising and challenging situations, better.

A year ago, I would not be coping with this as well as I am now, because I was still struggling with self care. So, this is how I understand that some situations, do very much increase anxiety and other symptoms, and are difficult to deal with, as a result. And this very much depends on our individual capacity to implement needed self care.

I now actually do know I need self care, and I do deserve it, and understand there needs to be no guilt, and it benefits everyone. And I don’t have to explain myself to people either. But, it has been a process to get to this point and it is worth the journey.

Love the way she survived…

This was kindly sent to me, so sharing for all who this also applies to ❤

I too see the difference in people who have survived considerable trauma, and yet in spite of all they endure, they have developed such compassion and empathy for others, who have also suffered.

There is no substitute for lived experience, or the insight and empathy that can develop as a result.