Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.

Duplicitous behaviours/words


Discussed this in counselling this week. I will often pick up on people who are engaging in duplicitous speech/actions and I will sense the motivation for it.

I choose to consider why this is occurring, how it affects me, the extent of any issues being caused by it, and what I need to do as a result.

I have standards people need to meet to be a part of my life, and ongoing dishonesty, is not something I choose to condone, ignore, accept or tolerate.

There are many ways to be dishonest and this is just one of many. And I can discern these behaviours, in a completely calm manner….. knowing this behaviour in others, is nothing to do with me.




Author: Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

I am a survivor of complex and multiple trauma and abuse, who at the age of 40, began my healing journey. I am using my journey to recovery and healing, to help others, to help survivors feel less alone, validated, encouraged and to enable others to understand themselves more. Complex trauma, particularly from severe, prolonged childhood abuse, is profoundly life changing. Complex trauma produces complex adults. The journey to recovery is a painful, often lonely, emotional daily challenge and it is my aim to encourage others in their daily battle. ~ Lilly Hope Lucario

2 thoughts on “Duplicitous behaviours/words

  1. Yes – I see as well. I have since childhood; always knew when someone was lying or could see true intent. I’ve always been an Empath. I like what you say about choosing our reactions. I process it in a similar way. It’s easier for me to process when I’m observing it between others. It takes more work when it’s directed at me. I have to flip my view.

  2. Sometimes I can see this, but I have to admit I have also been completely taken by surprise at times by someone I believed but should not have. The worst case was probably Don, a guy I met shortly after the separation from my first husband. I had barely noticed him until he began chasing after me. All the initiative was his, but I gave him space in my life because I was lonely and wanted someone around. I appreciated his interest and good-natured company… until a few month later, he admitted to me that he was married. I wonder now though if my loneliness got me to deliberately turn off my intuition…???

    As you suggest, this was not about me but about him. But it did end up hurting me a lot.