There is a demand in society, to suppress traumatic experiences, and the consequences of them. Victims of abuse, and childhood abuse & neglect, are deemed to be weak and ‘acting the victim’ when they ‘don’t get over it’. We are deemed weak when we have emotions.
So society in general pushes people to bury their trauma and the consequences of the trauma. And it does affect your whole life. Many survivors don’t even realise how the trauma is affecting their life. Often people wait years, decades before seeking help. Some don’t ever seek help, sadly.
This link is advice from a trauma expert – Bessel van der Kolk. His work is excellent and I promote his work continually and have his book on my website book list. http://www.healingfromcomplextraumaandptsd.com/#!book-recommedationsresources/cnqp
The term ‘don’t be a victim’ plays into victim shaming. Victim blaming is everywhere, in overt and covert ways. Victims of abuse – victim shame others for not healing as quickly, for not being as strong as they claim to be. All toxic attitudes.
I did bury my traumatic experiences. My entire childhood – the first 20 years of my life, were trauma, abuse and neglect – every single day. Continue reading